Dems Cope w/ Mid-Term Electile Dysfunction – Viagra In Short Supply

Webster’s Dictionary recently added a new phrase that pretty much sums up the problems facing the Democratic Party today as the important mid-term elections roll ever closer. Eloquently said, the new phrase has captured the imagination of conservative pundits as the predominate adjective used most often on television to describe the situation with the left.

 Electile Dysfunction: the inability to become aroused over any of the candidates offered by the Democrat party after two years of lackluster performance and general party apathy.

Hoping the sexual enhancement drug Viagra will somehow increase their political libidos, millions of Democrats across the US have nearly cleaned out pharmacy stocks in a rush to somehow jump start an agenda that has completely and simply run out of steam.

Promises of a ‘Change You Can Believe In,’ that never happened, and the overused word ‘Hope,’ as a means of instilling some vague, unspoken promise to voters, has left many ardent supporters of the current administration without a message for mid-term voters to attach to. According to a Democratic spokesman who wished to remain anonymous, “What are we going to talk about?  The economy? Obama’s bow to the King of Saudi Arabia? Lindsay Lohan’s arrest?”

In the Administration’s closest inner circle, unrest and anxiety have caused the once steadfast supporters of Barack Obama to suddenly look for greener pastures away from Washington and the deepening shadow of failed performances. But many are also looking for any free government stockpiles of Viagra they can take with them before they leave.

Rahn Emmanuel, the President’s Chief of Staff, was recently observed taking a two-year supply of Viagra in order to help his political run for office of Mayor in Chicago. Others applauded the action, but noted that with Emmanuel, particularly concerning his past reputation, the only thing the Viagra could do is to make him taller.

Hampered with a struggling economy that has gone nowhere except to line the pockets of bankers, unions, and  bloated big government, the economy is showing signs of dipping into a second recession as important economic indicators have steadily dipped over the past three months.

The weak economy, coupled with the report of increased numbers of government employees making over a hundred thousand dollars a year, has given taxpayers little to celebrate. A recent GOA report revealed a 1500% rise in government officials making a hundred thousand dollars in salary plus perks since the current Administration has taken office, has strongly hinted at some election favors being repaid with well-paying government jobs.

Questionable programs that were supposed to create jobs through bailout monies have left a bitter taste in many people’s mouths as revelations of a recent California Obama-approved project that funneled over $120 million federal dollars into a Los Angeles infrastructure project, but only created 56 new jobs! That’s $2.2 million per job not including overtime and benefits .

Even the recent Cash for Clunkers stimulus for the heavily unionized auto industry has caused some Republican comments…as well as some back-handed praise.

According to an industry insider and frequent commentator on conservative issues….”We’d loved the Cash for Clunkers Program. It removed millions of Obama bumper stickers from the road!”

Conservative leaders have offered some advice for their leftist brethren who are suffering from the embarrassing condition known as Electile Dysfunction…”Relax, it’s only two more years and everything will be lright for you guys once again.”

Author: Bargis Tryhol

Hello, I'm Bargis Tryhol and currently live somewhere in the southern part of the USA. I have been writing humor for quite a few years and love to make fun of the liberals who in recent years seem to be falling by the wayside in droves. My online following is fairly large now, so a big 'shout out' to all who have embraced my lopsided humor. I do appreciate the support. You can visit my website Satire World for more outrageous humor.... SatireWorld.com Comments or retribution? Bargistryhol@aol.com