Category: Society
EMERGENCY ROOM! HELP ME! I’M DYING!
God cursed me with a heart condition. I have a good idea why, but if I tell you, I’ll have to kill myself. One dreadful symptom is shortness of breath (SOB). That and an adverse echocardiogram led my cardiologist to…
NHS High School Campaign: Don’t Do Drugs Kids, You Might End Up a Tory!
A secret leak from our confidential anonymous sources tell us the NHS are planning to launch a controversial new primary and high school ad campaign to warn kids: ‘Cayman Cokeheads? Just say no!’ One confidential prize cut is as follows!…
UNDUE SPIRITUAL INFLUENCE??? Pope Francis Endorses Corbyn as UK PM!
Scandal-plagued, sexually questionable Scientologist sympathiser Pope Francis has recently found out that radical activism brings strange bedfellows. He has now given an edgy endorsement to flamboyantly bitter career politician Jeremy Corbyn, widely considered discredited on account of the Labour party’s…
The Vampire And The Vamp
The vampire waited patiently, ravenously in the dark alley. His never ending thirst was a suction within himself that pulled and tore at every organ. Weakened by lack of finding a victim for several nights, he knew he must find…
Teacher Accused of MURDERING 2 people! Guess How She Makes Bail…
Miranda Jensen, a third-grade teacher at Middlebette Elementary School, has been in court the past few weeks because of two dead children. She has been in holding since the 2nd of May and continues to deny any relationship with the…
PR DISASTER! Pope Francis Signs Peace Treaty With Church of Scientology
After inking a highly controversial covenant of theological solidarity with the Grand Imam of al-Azhar University, notoriously accident-prone not so militant cleric Pope Francis has been continuing his famously tolerant and inclusive approach to religion by declaring a holy crusade…
REVOLUTION! (By Richard Seltzer)
Once there was a kingdom where the farmers were unhappy, the tradesmen were unhappy, the soldiers were unhappy, and even the king himself was unhappy. The farmers blamed it on the tradesmen. The tradesmen blamed it on the soldiers. The…
Size Matters! (By Richard Seltzer)
Bob was an advertising executive who had a bright future ahead of him in the sales of women’s undergarments, especially brassieres. Starting in the art department, he had won praise and promotion for the beauty of the female forms he…
Lordy, Lordy, Was I a Terrible Waiter! (But My CUSTOMERS Were WORSE!!!!!!)
Why did you choose the restaurant where I worked at that particular time? A few seconds earlier or later, you would have been safe. But Fate dropped the piano on your head, and you drew me as your waiter. You…
Some People Confuse Trump With… THE TOOTH FAIRY?! (Easy Mistake to Make…)
Arno Hill, the Mayor of Lordstown, Ohio, was interviewed by NPR radio the other day in relation to the fact that General Motors (remember them? They were once famous for making cars, lots of cars. And for Micheal Moore getting…