4K Glossy News Podcast 007 (9-7-15)

In my September 7th 4K/UHD podcasts, I cover a lot of ground, some of it even interesting. Here are just a few of the topics:

A reminder this is available in UHD on YouTube by searching “Glossy Podcast” or as an MP3 on iTunes by searching “Glossy News”.

* What kind of stats and comments can a new podcast expect to get? Bear in mind, I’ve worked very hard at promotion, but I’m not famous, so it’s a slog, but it’s worth it. Read more 4K Glossy News Podcast 007 (9-7-15)


Fappers Rejoice as Aussie Developer Shuts Down Proposed Data Retention Plan

Melbourne born software Developer Mike Pearce has thwarted government plans to impose mandatory data retention for all Australian citizens by fundamentally changing the way the internet works.

Australian PM, Tony Abbott is currently being accused of bullying the opposition and scaring the Australian people into submission with his new data retention plan.

The plan is being fiercely fought by Australia’s newest political superhero-to-the-people, Senator Scott Ludlam. Read more Fappers Rejoice as Aussie Developer Shuts Down Proposed Data Retention Plan


Ichiro Suzuki Passes Drug Test, Fails Turing Test

When MLB teams acquire new players they expect their very best and this MLB offseason has featured an almost overwhelming amount of moves as teams try to upgrade their rosters and shift their focus in a new direction.

Since Ichiro entered the American major league with the Seattle Mariners in 2001, Ichiro has been a puzzle of great intrigue and interest. Read more Ichiro Suzuki Passes Drug Test, Fails Turing Test


Lessons from This Year in Tech and Fashion

Tech is the new fashion. If that was ever in doubt, ask the editors from Vogue, Marie Claire and other fashion magazines who attended the Apple Watch launch in Cupertino, CA, instead of covering New York Fashion Week (NYFW).

​The fashion and technology worlds have more in common than some people realize. One is a cut-throat industry, fueled by gossip and petty jealousies, the search for the next big thing and the need to stay ahead of look-a-like designs – and the other is the fashion business. Read more Lessons from This Year in Tech and Fashion


Philae Lander Voted “Bouncy House Of The Year”

Physics Today, the flagship journal of the American Institute of Physics, has announced the ESA Philae lander is the first winner in a new category in their annual awards for breakthroughs in physics, “Bouncy House Of The Year”.

“This year saw many breakthroughs, but the one that stood out from all the rest was the ESA’s repeated and successful bouncing of their 2 billion dollar lander on the comet 67P, lodging it on it’s side under a cliff, and rendering the lander useless and impotent to science” said AIP President Justin Fundworthy.

“By bouncing the lander several times yet remaining on the surface, the Rosetta and Philae team have proven when future human comet colonist rent a bouncy house for their childrens birthday parties, the bouncy house will not fly off into space” said Harry Johnson, editor of PhysicsWorld.com.

“It’s been an exciting year for physics, we commend the work of the nine runners-up but it’s hard to beat a good bouncy house GIF” said Dr. Johnson.


Self-Driving Electric Cars will Soon Be Free, If You Can Afford One

When I add “self-driving” to “electric car”, you may envision a double-unicorn, but these beasts of legend are right around the corner, and they will be damn near free, assuming you can afford one.

Elon Musk has announced that “The Tesla car next year will probably be 90 percent capable of autopilot.” Cadillac will have their “hands & feet free” cruise control shortly thereafter. Nissan has repeated stated that they will have 100% autonomous vehicles by 2020. Remember, that’s only five years away.

An autonomous electric car would save you so much money it could easily pay for itself.

Let’s look at the 10-year cost of owning a new car

Fuel Cost:

According to PlugInAmerica, the average cost for a gallon of regular gasoline in the US over the past three years was $3.53/gallon. By using 15,000 miles as the average amount of miles a person will drive in a year, the annual cost of gasoline for the average car will be $2,135 per year.

Conversely, the average cost of electricity in the US is 12 cents per kWh. Therefore the average person driving an average EV 15,000 miles per year pay about $540 per year to charge it.

SAVINGS: $1,595 per year. $15,950 over ten years.

Insurance Cost:

Assuming you have a clean driving record, you can insure most vehicles with liability-only for about $750/year, with collision adding another $500. Comprehensive, the insurance that covers your damages if someone else hits you, is only a couple hundred.

Self-Driving cars have thus far proved to be extremely safe and highly unlikely to cause an accident. Google has already logged over 700,000 autonomous miles without causing an accident. This means that liability and collision insurance for self-driving cars will have substantially lower insurance premiums. Perhaps only 20% of the current rates.

SAVINGS: $1,000 per year. $12,000 over ten years.

Maintenance Cost:

Electric cars have fewer moving parts than an internal combustion vehicle. Think of the items that most commonly fail on cars, and you’ll find almost none of them on an electric car. In my 24-years of driving I’ve had maintenance and repairs like:

• Replace fuel pumps
• Replace a bad transmissions
• Replace a clutch
• Repair leaky, failing exhaust
• Oil changes
• Blown radiator
• Replace water pump (three different vehicles!)
• Blown head gasket
• Lost belts
• Replace timing chain
• Full system fluid flush

None of these things are required to repair or maintenance because these systems don’t even exist in an electric car. The cost of maintaining an electric car is estimated to be 1/3rd less than that of an internal combustion vehicle. So instead of $14,310 over the first eight years, it’s more like $9,444.

SAVINGS: $487 per year. $4,866 over ten years.

Purchase Cost:

At this point, the question isn’t “how much does it cost” but rather, “how much is it worth?”

If you could get a self-driving, electric car that lasts 10-years for $15,950 (or $19,885, since many states exempt sales tax on electric vehicles and there is a federal tax credit of $2,500 toward the purchase of one,) it would literally become a zero cost car just from the savings in fuel prices.

If you could whack another $12,000 off on insurance premiums, that means you’d get a free ten-year car even if it cost $33,014.

And with the maintenance cost savings factored in, it would get you up to a retail purchase price of $38,269.

The Choice

If I offered you a brand new gasoline powered car for FREE, or a brand new electic car or equal quality for $38,269, your ten year cost of ownership would be identical. They would both cost you the same. But gasoline cars are not free. They still cost serious money.

The cheapest cars on the market are around $15,000. A $15k gasoline car would cost the same over a ten year period as a $52,269 electric vehicle.

Batteries are expensive, there’s no getting around that. They are steadily coming down in price, and may see a huge dip once Tesla’s GigaFactory is running, but for now, let’s forget that. If a manufacturer could offer you a 100% electric, self-driving vehicle for less than $53,000, and you can afford it, you would be pennywise and a pound of dumbass if you didn’t take it.

The rich can afford to get richer

It still doesn’t pay to be broke. The rich get 0% financing, instead of the 582% charged by payday lenders in Idaho. Having money to keep in your bank account makes it a free service, as opposed to those who dip below zero and incur fees of $35 per transaction. The house I’ve purchased for $1,228/month couldn’t be rented for less than $1,550, and the luxury furniture I bought cash cost a fraction what a rent-to-own contract would give me for inferior furnishings at a place like Aarons.

This is, unfortunately, more of the same. If you can buy such a vehicle outright, or finance it on A+ terms, you’ll know upfront how much money you’re saving, or actually making on the deal. If you don’t qualify for the payments, even considering you’ll save easily half of your payment in gas, maintenance and insurance costs, you’re still going to be left out in the cold.


Many Using iPhones to Surgically Replace Entire Brains

In the latest cool trend to hit the streets masses of young people are getting their I-phones installed in their heads where their brains used to be.

The popularity and 24 hour a day usage of Apples extremely popular gadget has brought about this new fad that has taken the modern world by storm.

The surgical operation, which only takes a few hours but is costly, rewires a persons nerves to interact with the small machine instead of the much weightier brain which is removed. Read more Many Using iPhones to Surgically Replace Entire Brains


Netflix to Extend Time Elapsed Before “Are You Still Watching?” Prompt

CALIFORNIA: Neil Hunt, Chief Product Officer for Netflix, announced today that the company would be increasing the amount of time a viewer must watch a show before the video service asks if they are, indeed, still watching.

“In 103% of cases, with a margin of error of 3%, the consumer is still watching [Netflix]. We vastly underestimated just how startlingly long the typical customer is engaged with our service.” Read more Netflix to Extend Time Elapsed Before “Are You Still Watching?” Prompt


Brief Dating Site Blah Blah Whatever [Video]

Dating sites pride themselves on how complicated they are. This site breaks that mold by asking you to do less and less.

“Almost nothing, really,” said Byron Dwight, CEO and actual site member. “Just a quick tl;dr of yourself and we’ll get you matched up with someone.”

TL;DR is an internet abbreviation meaning “too long; didn’t read,” and it’s the big selling point of Tillder Dating. Read more Brief Dating Site Blah Blah Whatever [Video]


Pittsburgh PUC Halts Ride-Sharing At Kennywood

PITTSBURGH — Ruling that the threat to public safety is “theoretically a very real problem under the principles of String theory,” a two-judge panel has shut down ride-sharing at Kennywood park in West Mifflin.

The ruling makes it illegal for more than one person to ride on any of the park’s attractions at one time.

Though no major or minor injuries or incidents have occurred in recent history, the PUC said in a statement that, “Our job isn’t to consider public opinion, fun, or common sense. Our job is to look out for public safety in every imaginable universe, even the alternate universes wherein this issue presents an actual danger.” Read more Pittsburgh PUC Halts Ride-Sharing At Kennywood


“Drones May Not Attack Banks” says new U.S. Drone Czar

WASHINGTON – The newly appointed US Drone Czar announced today that attack drones operating on US soil may not attack US banks without prior approval of the Federal Reserve Bank.

“Let me be clear,” stated General Quentin Easing, the new US Homeland Drone Czar. “We are only permitted to attack US banks on US soil with attack drones if we receive prior authorization from the US Federal Reserve Bank. We can’t just attack any bank we like. It’s the law.” Read more “Drones May Not Attack Banks” says new U.S. Drone Czar


The Five Stages of NSA Surveillance Grief

If the recent leaks about the US government’s surveillance of all worldwide electronic communications have left you upset or confused, then you may be experiencing one of the five stages of NSA surveillance grief.

Much like Kuebler-Ross’ Five Stages of Grieving over death, the Five Stages of NSA Surveillance Grief shows the natural phases that individuals go through after learning that the US government has had complete access to all their electronic communications for many years. Read more The Five Stages of NSA Surveillance Grief


HS Student Answers Every SAT Question w/ “Google”, Gets Perfect Score

HERMINIE, PA — Local High School Student Roger Burman recently scored a perfect 2400 on the Scholastic Aptitude Test (SAT) after answering every question with the word, “Google,” sources report.

According to English Teacher Frank Gimley, who proctored the exam, “I figured something was different about [Burman] right off the bat. We started with the Mathematics section, and all these kids were scrawling equations like crazy. But not Roger. Read more HS Student Answers Every SAT Question w/ “Google”, Gets Perfect Score


Scientists Find Water On Nearby Useless, Soda-less Planet

CAPE CANAVERAL, FLA. — Scientists with the NASA space program recently uncovered several million gallons of potable water — though no traces of carbonated liquid of any kind — on a large, nearby planet in what is being pronounced “a hugely disappointing discovery that in no way whatsoever helps the human species or its quest to find a realistically habitable alternative to Earth,” sources report. Read more Scientists Find Water On Nearby Useless, Soda-less Planet


78% of Radio Shack 1993 Catalog Is on Your Phone, but Better

I recently got to reminiscing of days gone by. When I was young, carefree, and studied the Radio Shack catalog even more religiously than religion, and I was religious.

When I realized, all those gizmos and gadgets I so desperately wanted are now all on the phone in my pocket, and they’re much better, and much cheaper, and we all have access to them.

I decided to dig up an old Radio Shack catalog, choosing 1993 as it was roundly 20-years ago, and found it conveniently hosted here at Radio Shack’s official page. Read more 78% of Radio Shack 1993 Catalog Is on Your Phone, but Better


Evil Excel Spreadsheet Doing Everything In Power to Stop Guy Leaving Work on Time

INDIANAPOLIS – Seemingly not content to just let office worker Aaron McMillan clock out of work at the regular time of five-thirty, a Microsoft Excel spreadsheet is doing everything in its Goddamn power Monday to make sure that McMillan stays behind at least another 3 minutes, while it just does its thing.

Taking an effing lifetime to finish saving, the spreadsheet, which the 31-year-old Wepler Finance employee had seamlessly used throughout his schedule to input the company’s quarterly profits, initially seemed to be closing down before it just now froze up. Read more Evil Excel Spreadsheet Doing Everything In Power to Stop Guy Leaving Work on Time


Large Hadron Collider ‘Not Taken Over By Sinister Villain Who Plans To Take Over The World’

Breaking News from Switzerland today, the Swiss Government are under scrutiny after an inside source leaked that Large Hadron Collider nicknamed ‘The Black Hole Generator’ by cyber geeks with no life, may have been ‘acquired’ by the power hungry megalomaniac Dr Apocalypse.

The world’s largest and highest-energy particle accelerator in the hands of such a man could spell the end for humanity as we know it. Read more Large Hadron Collider ‘Not Taken Over By Sinister Villain Who Plans To Take Over The World’