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Christine O’Donnell Not Happy About Fielding Witch Jokes

Christine O’Donnell Not Happy About Fielding Witch Jokes

When Christine O’Donnell of Delaware won the election to run for a United States Senate seat on the GOP ticket, she was all smiles, but it didn’t take long for the bones in her closet to start rattling. The biggest bone rattler of all turned out to be a very savvy Bill Maher, who just happens to be sitting on a gold mine of old Chris O’Donnell tapes from his old television show, Politically Incorrect. Maher has threatened O’Donnell that if she doesn’t accept his offer to appear on his new show Real Time with Bill Maher, he’s will release a video a week up until the election in November. Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, Television1 Comment

Comedy Central Pseudo News Anchor and Pundit Confirm DC Rally

Comedy Central Pseudo News Anchor and Pundit Confirm DC Rally

On September 16th, Jon Stewart officially announced the Million Moderate March, a “Rally to Restore Sanity”. The event will coincide with Stephen Colbert’s “Stephen Colbert – March to Keep Fear Alive!” rally. This means the passionate, coordinated campaigns of Reddit and ColbertRally.com have actually done the jobs they set out to do. Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, Television3 Comments

Glenn Beck Audience at Record Levels – Liberals Stunned

Glenn Beck Audience at Record Levels – Liberals Stunned

The highly viewed FOX television show The Glenn Beck Show has surged upward in viewership the last few weeks with the media industry Nomitron Ratings at an unheard of 9.4 high. The only other broadcast to hit anywhere near this mark was Kennedy’s assassination, the moon landing in 1969, and Princess Diana’s death, and of course the pilot episode of the 1983 miniseries “V”, which had a 22 share. Continue Reading

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Posted in Strange People, Television2 Comments

Colbert’s Nation Rallies for War, Raises Battle Capital

Colbert’s Nation Rallies for War, Raises Battle Capital

There’s little debating the power of Stephen Colbert and the Colbert Nation. It has amongst the youngest news audience out there (80% of his viewers are in the coveted 18-49 demographic, according to a recent Pew Poll,) but the bigger story is Colbert’s ability to rally them to support any given cause. Take for instance the fan-advocated goal of raising $100,000 for underfunded school programs. Impossible? Maybe not. Continue Reading

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Posted in Internets Tubes, Television7 Comments

FlashForward Coming Back to Prime Time this Fall?

FlashForward Coming Back to Prime Time this Fall?

According to producers of the one-season wonder television show FlashForward, the show has been rescheduled to appear for another five seasons with a guaranteed story arc. Fans from around the world want to believe the show will return, but having seen the show, they admit they never know what to believe. Continue Reading

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Posted in Entertainment, Television3 Comments

‘Jersey Shore’ Cast Leaves Vast Greasy Oil Slick Off NJ Beach

‘Jersey Shore’ Cast Leaves Vast Greasy Oil Slick Off NJ Beach

EPA officials issued a temporary restraining order against the cast and crew of the popular MTV show ‘Jersey Shore.’ The restraining order cited the discovery of a 14 mile greasy oil slick that spread northward from Seaside Heights up to Sandy Hook caused by the cast taking a dip in the surf last weekend. Continue Reading

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Posted in Environment, Television0 Comments

Church Says Censoring Muhammad Violates Equal Opportunity Hate

Church Says Censoring Muhammad Violates Equal Opportunity Hate

In a classic U-turn change of mind the creators of the popular pint sized animated television show “South Park” decided to sensor their 200th episode. This preceded an almost global outcry from Muslims following the depiction of Muhammad [saw] in a brown bear suit alongside making fun of other religious figures such as Jesus and Buddha who interestingly remained ‘uncensored’. Continue Reading

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Posted in Television1 Comment

Keith Olbermann Announces 174th Day of Mind-Numbing Ordinariness in Columbus, Ohio

Keith Olbermann Announces 174th Day of Mind-Numbing Ordinariness in Columbus, Ohio

As every viewer of Countdown with Keith Olbermann on MSNBC knows, at the very end of his show, Keith Olbermann makes a point of counting down the days from when Bush declared “Mission Accomplished” in Iraq, the beginning of the Iraq war, and more recently, the day of the oil rig explosion that killed 9 oil workers in the Gulf of Mexico.

Facing criticisms for his negative view of the world, Olbermann has been asked why he only focuses on issues over which we have no control when he could be bringing to light matters that we may be able to turn around for the better. Continue Reading

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Posted in Entertainment, Television1 Comment

Forget Doomsday Prophecies; Beer Prices are Skyrocketing

Forget Doomsday Prophecies; Beer Prices are Skyrocketing

SOMEWHERE, USA (GlossyNews) — Another Friday the 13th came and went without incident. It’s as if the Universe doesn’t take itself seriously anymore. Mars can run retrograde and Saturn can be humping Venus (relatively speaking of course) and still life goes on without so much as a blip.

Until now. Quietly staying behind in the shadows was the bad news of the century waiting its turn to slap the face of every serious beer guzzler out there. Thursday’s business section, August 12th, jumping the gun on every conceivable Friday the 13th doomsday scenario, “The price of a pint may be going up 40%!” Continue Reading

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Posted in Human Interest, Television0 Comments

Theoretical Physicist Fails to Impress Americas Got Talent Judges with Wormhole Act

Theoretical Physicist Fails to Impress Americas Got Talent Judges with Wormhole Act

CHICAGO, Illinois (GlossyNews) — Things got a little strange Wednesday night in Chicago when a one-man act by the name of Arcus Temporis came on stage armed only with a chalkboard and a piece of chalk and an eraser.

“What is your name?” asked Piers Morgan of this wild-eyed man. In a Swedish accent, the man gave his name, “I am Arcus Temporis and I am 87 years olt,” he said as he took in the huge crowd he stood before.

“And what are you here to do for us tonight, Arcus?” said Piers. Continue Reading

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Posted in Science, Television0 Comments

FlashForward Cancelled, and Five Reasons Why That’s Good

FlashForward Cancelled, and Five Reasons Why That’s Good

The high-budget ABC sci-fi less-than-thriller known as Flashforward has been canceled, and by a few accounts, it’s a tragedy. By many more accounts, however it’s a good thing, and here are just five of the biggest reasons why that’s actually the case. Continue Reading

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Posted in Television, Top Stories99 Comments

Here’s How American Idol Can Save (or ruin) the 2011 Season

Here’s How American Idol Can Save (or ruin) the 2011 Season

American Idol easily established itself as a ratings powerhouse in its first season, but now that Paula has left the show, and Simon has likewise finished his last show (though for very different reasons,) the viability of the franchise is up in the air. Here are some of the ways the show can save itself, or ruin itself, moving forward. Continue Reading

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Posted in Television1 Comment

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