Category: Entertainment
Mayans, Nostradamus Agree on Donald Trump Armageddon Scenario
Machu Picchu, dusk – GlossyNews.com: After ten seconds of reciprocal nodding over candlelight, Nostradamus and Mayan elders have announced they are in complete agreement with their Donald Trump apocalyptic destruction prophecies. “I clearly mentioned that guy in the 3rd verse…
Dennis Miller Offering Glenn Beck Sidekick Job
Dennis Miller always had aspirations of being the next Bill O’Reilly or “Billy” as he calls him, or the next Glenn Beck. But, even though he does have his own radio talk show, so far, it’s only gotten him a…
Britain Stretched To Breaking Point, Satirists Leaving in Droves
British PM David Cameron today admitted that “in the clearest possible terms” Britain is currently stretched to breaking point. Military involvement in Iraq, Afghanistan, and now Libya have undoubtedly taken a heavy toll on available resources, and the financial squeeze…
Wonki-Leak #264: FOX News E-mail Instructs Interns on ‘Doctoring’ the Truth
WONKI-LEAKS #264 Our team of ever intrepid hackers have recently managed to intercept the following instructions being given to new FOX interns via e-mail as they help the massive television and radio giant prepare the scripted material for their pundits…
CIA Secret Operation “Xbox 360 Fever” Underway to Topple Taliban
The CIA is mum on a new secret operation designed to take the Taliban out once and for all. The concept of Operation “Xbox 360 Fever” is based on this country’s own experience with realistic computer games. “It is mainly…
Patriots for Pot Put Support behind Morgan Freeman for President
A more liberal-leaning sect of the Tea Party known as the Patriots for Pot are putting their money behind actor Morgan Freeman for President even though he’s not running (officially). Dilbert “Doobie” Warner, President of the Patriots for Pot Party…
Glenn Beck Defeated by Boycott, Ratings, Sensibilities
Dramatic drops in ratings combined with a lack of any reputable (top-of-market-paying) advertiser willing to be part of his show have finally taken their toll on Glenn Beck and his FOXNews program. Beck offered a rare olive branch, saying, “…I…
Charles Manson Becomes Newest Member of Oprah Book Club
Corcoran State Prison, CA- You see what they try to do. They get in our minds. We gotta beat them by being in our own minds. You’re not the thought police. I’m the f’ing thought police. It’s because I think….
History of Snowboarding for Snowboarding History Buffs
Most sports enthusiasts are under the mistaken impression that the fine art of snowboarding is a recent development. Of course, most people who believe snowboarding is a fine art in the first place are snowboarders themselves who have suffered brain…
Mama Grizzly Prowls AOL w/ Mixed Success
NEW YORK, NY —Glossy News Dumpster diving in New York City the other day brought up this quite wrinkled but interesting tidbit – a résumé cover letter to: Top Mama Grizzly A. Huffington; cc: T. Armstrong — AOL From: First…