Author: Liberties-Taken
Pentagon Study Finds Atheist in Foxhole
Deputy Secretary of Defense Scott Turlock spoke from the Pentagon this week to announce news that portends even more paradigm challenges for the United States military forces. “Well we don’t know how he got there either. Our plate’s pretty full…
Census Results Say ‘Those People’ Now a Majority
The 2010 Census results continue to be compiled by the world’s leading demographers and statisticians. Aiding in the research is the latest advance in super computer technology, developed in a joint effort between NASA and IBM. Considered a quantum leap…
Government Unexpectedly Shut Down by Whiplash Epidemic
People who earn horse choking sums by predicting events that never come to pass find themselves choking in light of the current government shutdown. Consensus among pundits had predicted an imminent budget showdown due to efforts of Democrats eager to…
Evangelicals Target Home Depot’s Despotism
To casual observers Kathy Klavan might seem just another middle class homemaker raising her children in this Atlanta suburb, but her heart burns with a defining passion. She wants Home Depot punished for its efforts to destroy America. “Yeah, Calvin…
New Evidence Casts Doubt on ‘Official’ 9-11 Report
In short, digital enhancement of what was once thought to be video of an innocent family outing on a fateful day in American history now suggests the truth of 9-11 has long been packaged in a tissue of lies. At…
Labor Unrest Hits Candy Tycoon in the Sweet Spot
Shares of Wonka Foods International, the silent parent company of both Hershey and Nestle, opened sharply lower today as disturbing news reached Wall Street. It appears anti-collective bargaining legislation recently introduced in Wisconsin has spawned a backlash that now threatens…
Student Exposes WW2 Vet as Faker
What began as a school project has brought scandal to a formerly beloved citizen of this quiet Ohio town. Mayfield High School students in Ms. Lander’s AP History class were assigned to interview local war veterans. Young Hillary Pierce chose…
NASA Claims Solar Flare Mistaken for Distress Signal
A visibly distraught NASA Director Sharon Love spoke to reporters this week about what she called ‘that stupid thing with space aliens.’ “Look, I seriously don’t have time for this. My assignment is outreach to the Muslim world, period. When…
Micro-Religions Gain Market Share to Chagrin of Mega-Churches
This year’s Nielsen Prayer Ratings, considered an important indicator of sociological trends, put numbers to anticipated demographic shifts, yet contained surprises too. While “Please don’t let her be pregnant” prayers showed expected growth among males 18-25, the 2011 NPR garnered…
Rumsfeld Book Tour: Rocky Start
Former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld was often the center of controversy during decades of public service. It appears that tradition will continue in his new career as author. Rumsfeld’s recently released 800 page memoir “Known and Unknown” has set the…