Author: Bargis Tryhol
Michelle Begs Barack ‘No More Teleprompter at Dinner Table’
Things were a little tense last week when President and first-father, Barack Obama, sat down at the family dinner table and appeared to be somewhat speechless. This was the first family dinner since Michelle laid down the law and told…
Obama’s Sainthood Measure Stalls at The Vatican
Vatican City (GlossyNews.com) – Monsignor Alda Frattelli has responded to tabloid claims that the proposed Sainthood for American president, Barack Obama, has been tabled for now and his Holiness will review it in about ten or twenty years. “Yes, that…
Macy’s Nixes Taliban March During NYC Thanksgiving Day Parade
According to retailer giant Macy’s, the annual New York City Thanksgiving Day Parade was put on hold today by a New York court after an injunction was granted. The Taliban of Afghanistan protested the parade after its application to march…
Al Gore’s Zero-Carbon Auto Arrives in US; Pre-Sales Brisk
Detroit, MI – GlossyNews.com – Ex-Vice President, internet wizard, and noted global climate expert, Al Gore, has unveiled a unique total-green automobile offering that could change the way Americans drive. In collaboration with Tata Motors of India, Gore has invented…
Relationship Guru: Never Argue w/ Wife, Just Dicker a Bit
Sol Morgenstern has been a famous marriage counselor for almost 30 years. In that time he’s helped thousands of troubled couples get a real handle on their relationships no matter how troubled the situation or how stressful everyday life can…
Center of Known Universe Found During Routine Colonoscopy
University researchers have made a startling discovery after a routine colonoscopy of a 50 year old native American man revealed a phenomenon. The discovery is known in layman’s terms as….The Center of the Known Universe! The true Theta Victa Gamma…
Seattle Man Finds Dream Woman On Dating Website
SEATTLE, Wash. (Glossy News) — A wealthy Seattle man, Benjamin Dover, recently decided it was time to remarry. Having divorced his wife of five years after a rather steamy sex scandal that rocked downtown Seattle, Dover sought to put the…
After Arresting Thief, Officer in Custody for Dismembering Football Fans
DALLAS, Texas (Glossy News) — Lifelong Dallas resident, 82-year-old Opal Katz, was walking down busy Reynolds Street, struggling to drag two large plastic garbage bags behind her, when one of the bags ripped and began spilling new $20 bills onto…
San Francisco Announces 100% Homosexuality Milestone
SAN FRANCISCO, Calif. (GlossyNews) — The San Francisco City Council held a prime time press conference yesterday evening to announce some groundbreaking news for the inhabitants of the City by the Bay: “Our citizens now self-identify as 100 percent gay.”…
Pres. Hopeful Bargis Tryhol’s Economic Recovery Plan Makes Good Sense?
Honored writer, and now United States presidential candidate for the upcoming 2012 elections, Bargis Tryhol finally revealed his own Economic Stimulus plan to a throng of reporters outside his Gainesville mobile home. Bargis Tryhol, the endearing and witty writer turned…