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Loony Marxist Creep Jeremy Corbyn Warns: “Unregulated Media More Dangerous than ISIS!”

Loony Marxist Creep Jeremy Corbyn Warns: “Unregulated Media More Dangerous than ISIS!”

The UK media landscape will never be the same again, as a beloved figure threatens to treat global fake news MSM corporations very harshly…

As they pose a greater threat even than ISIS. Continue Reading

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North Koreans Score a Victory Before The Olympic Games Even Begin

North Koreans Score a Victory Before The Olympic Games Even Begin

Chances like this didn’t come very often. Especially in cash poor, politically isolated North Korea.

The plan to overlook political differences and cash in on the once in a millennium chance to be in the Olympics caused Kim Jong Un to forgo his nuclear rants with his Anglo doppelganger in the U.S. conquistador seat of power. Here was the chance to control events in America in a way the Russians could not even dream of.

His sister was to sit directly behind the Vice President of the United States at the Olympic Opening ceremony.

Directly behind…

This was an opportunity made in Heaven – or, in Jong Un’s case, a chance made in Hell. He now had the chance to bring down the US from within.

He himself would not go to the Olympics. There was too great a risk of assassination. The media attention would be too much as well. He could handle the overly staged photo shoots he managed from within his hermit kingdom; but in the South, there were those technologically advanced cameras that for all he knew might have the ability to photograph him naked through his clothes. The thought of nude photos of himself dropped as propaganda from enemy planes high over head made him shudder.

He would have his sister go. The bitch needed to start earning her keep and not be prancing around Paris spending more money in a day than the average peasant in North Korea could afford in their whole lives. She would do the dirty work.

From her position behind Pence she would firstly blow a micro-dart through a straw into his neck, that would render him unable to notice the violations of his space he would soon be experiencing. Then she would pour a biological dust down the collar of his jacket that over time would invade his body and shut down the creative and higher functions of his brain, leaving him with the mental abilities he had, basically; but unable to think creatively. She would then sneak microchips into the submarine sandwich that he brought with him because he was afraid of eating Korean food. These would eventually lodge in his brain. These chips would feed messages to him unconsciously via microphones, run by North Korean agents stationed in Washington D.C. These agents would broadcast information to his weakened brain, directing him to do their bidding.

Jong Un rubbed his hands in joy. He now had his own Manchurian Candidate in the White House itself, ready to execute his will. The first thing to do – have Pence suggest giving aid to them in money, food and military equipment. Second – sever US ties with South Korea. Third – have those two obnoxious actors who made fun of him in the movie The Interview publicly executed.

Unfortunately for them, the plot did not work. Pence’s higher mental facilities were already shut down from years of hyper-conservative upbringing and whatever little he had leftover were soon annihilated from serving on the Trump administration. Also, being used to putting up with annoying reporters and protesters, Pence had an inner instinctual mechanism for shutting out the messages from the Korean agents. The whole venture was a wasted effort.

Except for the drug in the micro-dart. It had a longer lasting effect that no one expected. For days thereafter Pence had a smile on his face, hugged gay athletes, was actually nice to people and lost the fossilized frozen look on his face. At least for a while….

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Kim Jong-Un Uses Passing Train to Face-Shave

Kim Jong-Un Uses Passing Train to Face-Shave

North Korea leader Kim Jong-Un has released a propaganda film of himself using a passing high speed train to shave his face. In a government campaign that hopes to encourage Korean citizens to reduce their razor purchases, Jong-Un has advised all his country’s face shavers to donate their razor expenditure to the nuclear programme instead Continue Reading

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Today’s Woke Nonsense Round-Up: Black Britain, Brexit & Bloody Human Rights Abusers!

Today’s Woke Nonsense Round-Up: Black Britain, Brexit & Bloody Human Rights Abusers!

White Nationalists Due to Be Triggered by Lack of White Britons in Ancient UK

Oh dear. It just so turns out the Ethnonationalists are basing their ideas on pseudo-science. Britons from 10 000 years ago weren’t ‘white.’  Continue Reading

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Most Infuriating Headlines of January 2018 Comin’ Atcha!

Most Infuriating Headlines of January 2018 Comin’ Atcha!

If you’re tired of fake news and fake real news as well, get a load of this stuff!

Jeremy Corbyn: “Unregulated Corporations More Dangerous than ISIS”

Zac Goldsmith: “Jeremy Corbyn More Dangerous than ISIS!” Continue Reading

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Tankiesplaining the Islamic State: Not All Terrorists!

Tankiesplaining the Islamic State: Not All Terrorists!

What would happen if jihadists decided to use the same excuses Communists use?

ISIS aren’t evil; just a deformed jihadist’s bureaucracy.

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Is Comrade Corbyn Too Extreme… Or Not Extreme Enough?

Is Comrade Corbyn Too Extreme… Or Not Extreme Enough?

I often think of Comrade Corbyn as Blair 2.0.

He hasn’t brought anything new of substance. Continue Reading

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Posted in Opinion/Editorial, World News0 Comments

Ode to Poland (Blessed Among Nations)

Ode to Poland (Blessed Among Nations)

Is Moscow then the Third Rome?
I know not, of a truth

Yet, O Poland!
Thou art our second great Jerusalem!
Of the perilousness of our longing Continue Reading

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Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, World News0 Comments

Sarcastic Thought Experiment: Accommodating Superstition, Accommodating Men

Sarcastic Thought Experiment: Accommodating Superstition, Accommodating Men

There is a protest in Tibet because a local cult forbids Buddhist nuns to drink alcohol. (This is a purely imaginary conceit of mine, of course!)
The Chinese Communist Party (CCP), faced with the opposition of the locals, decides to ban alcohol from local supermarkets. Continue Reading

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After Demise of Islamic State, Merkel to Invoke Harsh Laws Against Critics of the ISIS Caliph

After Demise of Islamic State, Merkel to Invoke Harsh Laws Against Critics of the ISIS Caliph

After prosecuting millions of ‘innocent’ Germans for insulting Donald Trump, strong leader and critic of lying news media distortions Angela Merkel has decided to punish ‘disrespectful’ critics of the ISIS Caliph. Continue Reading

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God Warns the Donald He’s Not Getting Any Private Revelations

God Warns the Donald He’s Not Getting Any Private Revelations

Like The Blues Brothers, George W Bush famously went to Iraq on a ‘mission from God.’

Same, of course for Tony Blair! Even if, unlike Wallace Runnymede, Tony Blair definitely, definitely, definitely ‘Shouldn’t Do God.’

But now Tough-Guy Tangerine Surprise Donald J Trump is being friendzoned by God. Continue Reading

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MSNBC: “Donald Trump Maintains Resounding 90% Approval Rating… In Russia!”

MSNBC: “Donald Trump Maintains Resounding 90% Approval Rating… In Russia!”

The cutting-edge liberal journalists of MSNBC have recently provided some astonishing revelations about the POTUS.

The home of Rachel Maddow, Keith Olbermann, and other people slightly to the left of Fox News and Infowars, has recently come up with some very interesting news about The Donald. Continue Reading

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Capitalism Undermined Every Day by Well-Heeled, Homeless, Entitled Middle-Class Scroungers

Capitalism Undermined Every Day by Well-Heeled, Homeless, Entitled Middle-Class Scroungers

The national magazine sold exclusively by the homeless, Big Woop, has faced many damning criticisms in its time.
Allegations abound of aggressive selling techniques which are harming the Universal Beltway Interest of Our Common Humanity and/or that of the Golden Pigsty (or, if you prefer, of the Houses of Perishing in Warminster). Continue Reading

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Dodgy, Machiavellian “House of Cards” Creep Thinks UKIP is Too Extreme for Him

Dodgy, Machiavellian “House of Cards” Creep Thinks UKIP is Too Extreme for Him

The sinister, sleazy Creep-in-Chief from House of Cards has decided that things have gone too far. Wild as he is, even UKIP is too much. Continue Reading

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Druids and Pagans Curiously Favourable Towards Islamic State / ISIS

Druids and Pagans Curiously Favourable Towards Islamic State / ISIS

Hamish Leonardo Kraftwerker Magee, Chief Druid of Dumfries, (previously known as Third Baron Trevelyan Montague of High Wycombe), has narrowly escaped being sent to Guantanamo Bay on the grounds of being a jihadist militant.
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David Norris Disappointed at not Coming First in “Greatest Ever Fine Gael Member” Poll

David Norris Disappointed at not Coming First in “Greatest Ever Fine Gael Member” Poll

Few were surprised when, in a recent RTE poll, Michael Collins was voted best ever Fine Gael man.
Indeed, it appears that many Irish people consider Collins a great man; perhaps even better than such leading lights of the party as, say, the charismatic and talented Enda Kenny. Continue Reading

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Important Message from the Jihadist-Humanitarian Industrial Complex

Important Message from the Jihadist-Humanitarian Industrial Complex

Greetings, slaves and serfs of the Neverending and Victorious Project of Our Common Humanity!

There is much divisive talk playing off ‘the Party of Humanity’ and ‘the party of the Caliphate.’ Continue Reading

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Posted in War Zone, World News0 Comments

Godders Bloom Unfairly Represented by MSM

Godders Bloom Unfairly Represented by MSM

Pre-Brexit story…

Post-Brexit laughs! Continue Reading

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