Category: Television
Upset Lassie Leaves Timmy Down The Well
Through an interpreter (the Dog Whisperer), Lassie has informed local police the she has no plans to tell them which well Timmy is stuck in. The famous collie, who has saved the boy from multiple wells, caves, fires, storms, lions,…
Baywatch Beauty Pam Anderson Cited For EPA Violations
Seedy Falls, CO – Pam Anderson, noted for being an environmentalist and animal rights activist, as well as a past Baywatch bimbo, recently purchased several hundred acres of pristine land, near Glenwood Springs, Colorado. Anderson hopes to use the tract…
Yet Another Outbreak of Rabies at FOX News
MINOT, North Dakota (GlossyNews) — The recent outbreak of rabies, the madness inducing disease spread by biting that has infected the major stars of Fox News Station, has spread far beyond the confines of their offices. In a new evolution…
Noted Anthropologist – Early Man “Flintstone” was Homosexual
Sure, you remember him. Yes, that adorable Fred Flintstone wearing his cave man outfit of an animal skin over one shoulder and hanging around with best friend Barney Rubble. The Flintstones were the modern age vision of a Stone Age…
Telescope Reveals Remains of Alice Kramden on Lunar Surface
Houston, TX – GlossyNews.com – Scientists released information, along with a Top Secret report, about the discovery of human remains dressed in what appears to be a yellow house dress. The remains were spotted laying in the open on the…
News Anchor Barbie Replaces Helen Thomas
NEW YORK, NEW YORK — GlossyNews: Born June 24, 1952 to German cartoonist parent R. Beuthien, Barbara Millicent Roberts, then known affectionately as Lilli, was post-war, sassy and ambitious and had no reservations talking about sex. In 1959 Lilli, now…
Acid Hoax Pays-Off w/ Major TV Contract, Minor Disfigurement
A beaming yet horribly disfigured Bethany Storros met with reporters today to announce her place on the 2011 Showtime fall schedule. The Vancouver native, savoring the notoriety generated by her self-mutilation and false claims of a racially motivated attack, was…
Remains of “Dancing with the Stars” Suicide Bomber Given Ticker Tape Parade
The headless remains of a suicide bomber who blew the entire cast and production company of the mind-numbing reality show “Dancing with the Stars” to a billion bits, were given a ticker tape parade in New York City over the…
Taylor Swift, Kanye West to Reignite Feud in New MTV Series
Taylor Swift and Kanye West will fight another day, this time on MTV’s newest greenlit show, Taylor versus Kanye. The 13 episode series, scheduled to premiere in January, will see the two artists in head-to-head competition every episode. The series…
Christine O’Donnell Not Happy About Fielding Witch Jokes
When Christine O’Donnell of Delaware won the election to run for a United States Senate seat on the GOP ticket, she was all smiles, but it didn’t take long for the bones in her closet to start rattling. The biggest…