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Mama Grizzly Prowls AOL w/ Mixed Success

Mama Grizzly Prowls AOL w/ Mixed Success

NEW YORK, NY —Glossy News Dumpster diving in New York City the other day brought up this quite wrinkled but interesting tidbit – a résumé cover letter to:
Top Mama Grizzly A. Huffington; cc: T. Armstrong — AOL
From: First Mama Grizzly S. Palin®
Re: Senior Executive Vice President position for AOL Mama Grizzlies Continue Reading

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Posted in Television3 Comments

Charlie Sheen Ring Tone Downloaded 3-Million Times

Charlie Sheen Ring Tone Downloaded 3-Million Times

LOS ANGELES, CALIF – Charlie Sheen paraphernalia has exploded onto the American public since the actor’s Two and a Half Men firing and interview antics, featuring such memorable quotes as “I have tiger’s blood,” and “I’m an F-18, bro!”

Now online merchandisers are offering Charlie Sheen bumper stickers, t-shirts, book bags, and keychains. Reportedly, an artificial insemination service now features “Adonis semen,” while a Russion wife-finding service has started offering “goddess pairs” at a 10% discount. Continue Reading

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Television0 Comments

Piers Morgan Determined to Fill Regis Philbin’s Vacancy

Piers Morgan Determined to Fill Regis Philbin’s Vacancy

Piers Morgan recently took over the top spot on CNN when he replaced Larry King and the Larry King Live show with his own Piers Morgan Tonight. Following the entertainment route of Ryan Seacrest, he’s now setting his sites on each and every opening in the entire industry, coast to coast. Continue Reading

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Television0 Comments

American Idol’s Simon Cowell Reams Famous American Idols

American Idol’s Simon Cowell Reams Famous American Idols

What would have happened if Simon Cowell, the inspiration and chief executioner for the wildly popular American Idol show had been around to judge the big stars of American music before they became legends.

Just how many of them would have survived the gauntlet of his withering criticism? I think many would have curled up under his sarcasm like slugs deluged by salt and withered away. Continue Reading

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Posted in Music, Television11 Comments

Conservatives Protest Olbermann Departure

Conservatives Protest Olbermann Departure

Isaac Newton once observed, “For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.” The truth of that is seldom seen more clearly than in the rough and tumble of American politics. And so it was this week as Tea Party activists launched candlelight vigils to return Keith Olbermann to the airwaves.

MSNBC’s unexpected removal of Olbermann from its prime time lineup is seen by many as a direct attack on Conservatives, and in the words of one Atlanta, GA protester “a damned dirty trick.” Continue Reading

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Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, Television2 Comments

Palin’s Comeback Trail Begins in Nashville Booby Bar

Palin’s Comeback Trail Begins in Nashville Booby Bar

Nashville, TN-After spending years exercising her First Amendment rights to encourage the murder of someone who wasn’t a “real American,” Sarah Palin’s media career has taken a turn for the worse after several real Americans were murdered by an anti-government kook.

The unflappable Palin, feverishly working on her big comeback, is working in a Nashville booby bar, the next stop after her recent spread in Hustler magazine, for which she was reportedly paid a whopping $127.50, which was about what Larry Flynt thought she was worth. Continue Reading

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Posted in Television4 Comments

Marilyn Manson Costume Upsets ‘Toddlers and Tiaras’ Viewers

Marilyn Manson Costume Upsets ‘Toddlers and Tiaras’ Viewers

A New Jersey mother, who previously dressed her 2-year old daughter in Wonder Woman and Madonna outfits complete with pointy cones, is taking more heat for the latest costume her now 3-year old daughter will be wearing in next season’s Toddlers and Tiaras on TLC.

When asked how she could possibly top dressing her daughter as a sexy super hero or over-the-top pop performer who made wearing lingerie on stage an everyday thing, Lorraine “Lala” Loopier (pronounced Loo-pee-ay) said that when you have a gorgeous little blonde daughter with “the look,” the sky is the limit. Continue Reading

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Posted in Entertainment, Television7 Comments

Montel Williams Caught w/ Drug Pipe; Sounds Like Episode of Montel

Montel Williams Caught w/ Drug Pipe; Sounds Like Episode of Montel

So here’s something fun and weird. Montel Williams was cited by the Milwaukee County Sheriff’s Office for possession of a marijuana pipe at the airport in Milwaukee. But is it strange that he had the pipe, that he was flying, or that he was in Milwaukee? Continue Reading

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Television1 Comment

Leno Heckled by the Ghost of Johnny Carson

Leno Heckled by the Ghost of Johnny Carson

After dispatching Conan O’Brien from the helm of “The Tonight Show”, Jay Leno returned triumphant months ago, only to be confronted by the heckling ghost of Johnny Carson, apparently still haunting the late-night set. Appearing nightly for months during Leno’s monologue, the apparition is obviously taking a toll on Leno’s timing…not that Leno’s timing was that tight to begin with. Continue Reading

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Posted in Television3 Comments

Republicans Earn Oscar Nod for ‘Best Act Put On By A Political Organization’

Republicans Earn Oscar Nod for ‘Best Act Put On By A Political Organization’

The Academy of Motion Pictures Arts & Sciences Committee has nominated the Republican Party for a special judges Oscar this year, ‘Best Act Put On By A Political Organization.’

Mrs. Tallulah Bankaccount, head of the board overseeing nominations, stated “The Republican Party has for decades put on a show of pretending to be in harmony with the interests of democracy while actually gutting all rules of checks and balances and concentrating power towards their interests. They have also taken upon themselves an incredible aura of religiosity while actually harboring some of the worst conniving hypocrites around. Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, Television5 Comments

Pundit Recycling Program Deemed Success

Pundit Recycling Program Deemed Success

Posted by your South America correspondents, Maria and Consuela Lopez. We heard somebody named Juan Williams got fired from NPR and wanted to get the real story. Because the excuse that was given, well? Gringos are a little off in the cabeza, but that just didn’t make sense. He said that seeing a bunch of Muslims in traditional outfits on a plane makes him nervous, and he gets fired? Continue Reading

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Posted in Television5 Comments

FOX “Frankenfans” Plot To Annihilate Liberals Revealed

FOX “Frankenfans” Plot To Annihilate Liberals Revealed

A bizarre plot has been uncovered that is sending chills down the spines of many liberals, free thinkers and political independents. A leaked memo from the highest levels of FOX News to leaders of the top ultra conservative movements reveals that a plot is underfoot to unleash millions of mentally altered FOX ‘Frankenfans’ upon all Americans who are at all left of center in the political realm. Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, Television1 Comment

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