Search Results for: democrats
Obama Delays Holidays Until After Election
(Washington, D.C.) – On Friday, President Obama pushed back making a decision on the long debated Keystone XL Pipeline until after the upcoming 2014 midterm elections. Worried about upsetting his core constituencies, Mr. Obama decided that while he had his…
Mass Murderer Calls Republicans Soft on Satanic Values
Dateline: LOS ANGELES—In a documentary about the life of the infamous anarchist and sadistic mass murder, Max Truculence, Mr. Truculence criticizes American conservatives for being “soft-hearted, effeminate phonies.” He spoke from prison, since he’s currently serving a thousand year sentence…
Romney Used Erstwhile Campaign Funds to Purchase Hoboken, New Jersey
HOBOKEN, NJ – In a stunning revelation Friday, a close aide to former Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney claims Romney poured virtually all of his campaign funds into purchasing the city of Hoboken, New Jersey. Mr. Romney, the frontrunner challenging…
Sarah Palin wants to save Christmas. You can help by buying her new book
Christmas Day is just around the corner, a time of peace and love and harmony, unless you’re Jewish. But this year, our Christian values of tolerance and forgiveness are being overwhelmed by a cataclysmic war on a scale the world…
Tea Party Advocates Destruction of All of America (Except its Golf Courses)
Dateline: WASHINGTON—Senator and reputed Tea Party leader Ted Cruz introduced a resolution to the Senate yesterday, calling for the immolation of all of the United States apart from its golf courses. Speaking in favour of the motion on the congressional…
Michele Bachmann Introduces Revelation Act
Today Congresswoman Michele Bachmann (R-MN) introduced a bill to “hasten the coming of Christ and the Revelation.” At a press conference she stated, “It seems to me as good Christians we should be doing something about the Second Coming. This…
GOP Agrees to Raise Debt Ceiling (if 19th Amendment Repealed)
House Majority leader Eric Cantor and Republican House Speaker John Boehner agreed to a short-term budget and debt ceiling increase of 7-9 days, so long as women’s right to vote is repealed. Democrats considering the measure. The government shutdown is…
Make No Mistake, This is a Republican Shutdown
Make No Mistake, This is a Republican Shutdown FOX News and conservative radio like to make out the issue as “both sides are to blame,” or more commonly just casting blame solely on the Democrats, but that’s just not true….
John Boehner Finishes Another Pint of Whiskey
John Boehner (R-Ohio) said Tuesday that he wants to have a “conflagration” with President Barack Obama and congressional Democrats over the government shutdown and deadline to raise the debt ceiling. “I wanna half a conflagration, I’m not drowl… drowning any…
The Myth of the GOP Repeal & Replace Talking Point
It was difficult for Republicans to fight against Obamacare. While they tried to vilify it, people actually liked what it stood for, and the rebate checks from premiums didn’t hurt either. But in opposing something designed to fix a national…