Search Results for: cnn
Trump’s Efforts to Lose the Election Continue to Falter
[Author’s Note: Glossy News’ Tim Jones was granted an exclusive interview with Donald Trump. He asked the Republican presidential nominee how he could still be running neck and neck with Hillary Clinton despite his repeated instances of inflammatory rhetoric and…
Red Ken Is Actually Trans-Jewish (1/2)
Good ol’ Red Ken recently lost his shit here at Glossy News over media accusations of antisemitism. He has also said ‘Technically lad, I might be a Jew meself, eh? Know what Ah mean, mate?!’
Dear American Refugees, Welcome to Canada
Greetings, American Refugees, On behalf of the people of Canada, we would like to welcome you to our country. We hope you’ll enjoy your stay. We’re starting to worry about your nation’s apparent complete psychological breakdown. You were doing so…
Open Letter to Glenn Greenwald: Greenwald & the Ghostly-Chilling Effects (2/3)
Did you know that Greenwald once addressed CAIR, which latter has been accused by the FBI of links to Hamas and the Muslim Brotherhood? And did you also know that Greenwald writes, apparently without a trace of irony, about ‘the military…
Republicans Vanish in Puffs of Smoke When called Evil
Dateline: WASHINGTON, D.C.—Democrats are rejoicing after the Republican population has shrunk by nearly two thirds because its opponents have discovered a technique for making the conservatives literally disappear. Hugh Bloomfeld, the technique’s originator, recalls his Eureka moment. “My right-wing sister…
Opinion: Ted Cruz is right. Why We Should Turn Away Refugees
In the wake of the deadly Isis terrorist attacks on Paris which killed 129 people and wounded hundreds more, the issue of whether or not to continue taking in refugees has divided us here in the United States of America,…
Glossy News Spam Surge: Establishment ‘Godwinbots’ to Blame (2/2)
As every establishment career politician knows, repetition is of the essence of persuasion. So, here’s a quick refresher on what the Godwinbots afflicting Glossy News and most of the serious internet are up to. Unpatriotic Pinko Troll Example #1: Goering…
Glossy News Spam Surge: Establishment ‘Godwinbots’ to Blame (1/2)
The loyal vigilance of the Glossy News team is keeping your comments pages free from spam, from dawn to dusk. Glossy News is at the forefront of taking out spambots whenever and wherever they poke their thieving, parasitical tentacles. But…
Donald Trump Thanks Glossy News for Our Unwavering Support
I recently did my bit for Donald Trump on The Spoof. But I’m continuing to support him by reprinting my article here! You’ll see in a moment why I’m doing this 😉 Donald Trump has recently expressed his heartfelt gratitude…
America is the greatest nation on earth – In your FACE, Denmark
On July 4th, we will once again celebrate our independence from the tyranny of England. Those British monarchs can be so oppressive. If it were up to Queen Elizabeth, we’d all be forced to drink Earl Grey tea with every…