Category: Top Stories
Wall Street Declares Itself An Independent Nation
Wall Street, in a surprising move today, declared itself a separate governing republic and detached from the US. Always considered a bulwark of staunch capitalism, the recent bailout has changed the economic thinking of it’s leaders. Upon succession Wall Str….
Glossy News Denies Black President Hoax
Toronto – A spokesperson for the Glossy News in Toronto this morning denied allegations that the Seattle-based news service fabricated the now famous story that a black man had won the US Presidential Race in 2008. The Toronto Sun Times…
In Rio de Janeiro, Buy Guns, Get Free Homes
A Brazilian gun dealer has offered to give a free home to the first five customers of the New Year if they buy any quality rifle from his gun shop. Jose Arma de Fogo says he got the idea from…
America Citizens Revolt: Dismantle Executives
Detroit, MI (GlossyNews) — The citizens of the United States today in a mass movement became the largest bank in the world. Strapped with the responsibility of saving huge financial institutions from insolvency and the auto industry as well as…
25yr Coma Man Wakes, Stunned to Learn of Black President
Ozark, Alabama – Jeff Stills was a successful crop farmer from the lower state of Alabama that was raised on a farm he would soon call his own. Unfortunately on the night of April 6th 1984 he flipped his General…
Is the US Losing its Patience with Canada?
Paris, TX — Canada, once one of America’s staunchest allies in North America and a bulwark against growing aboriginal unrest and encroachment of the Scandinavian powers, continues to befuddle the West. In the 1950s, 60s, and 70s Canada, with the…
Decline in Shopping Related Deaths Worries Retailers
New York, NY — Cautious retail executives sounded a note of warning on late Christmas Season sales despite early indicators of a slight increase in consumer spending over last year. According to these industry leaders, there is “a certain lack…
Al Queda Looking For A Few Good Yuppies
New York, NY — In a unique reversal of its former policy of attracting the poor and oppressed for its legions of bomb makers and bomb blowers, Al-Queda has changed its strategy to recruiting young, rich Westerners to its agenda…
Nelson Tops Leiberman in “Race to #60”
WASHINGTON, DC — The Race to #60 is as old as the Senate. Only one person can claim the title in this rare event, as the party in power tries to work it so the race doesn’t happen. It becomes…
True Love, Romance or Just Plain Sex… What’s It All Mean?
Although “falling in love” is probably the most wonderful feeling in the world and the most mysterious state of mind one can find him/herself within, science tells us that “falling in love” is very transient and not the answer to…