Wall Street, in a surprising move today, declared itself a separate governing republic and detached from the US. Always considered a bulwark of staunch capitalism, the recent bailout has changed the economic thinking of it’s leaders. Upon succession Wall Str. renamed itself “The Socialist Republic of Wall Str.”. Hugo Chavez sent them a telegram of congratulations.
Critics of this development suggest that having achieved independence Wall Str. would not have to return the $700 billion handout. Others muse that Wall Str. would stand to receive billions more in foreign aid. Others simply think they think they are better than everyone else and want to be further from ‘the little people’, making themselves in essence a giant gated community.
Southerners have been up in arms demanding to know why Wall Str. could leave the Union and they couldn’t and threatening to start the Civil War again.
Upon declaration of their independence, Wall Str, immediately began building a wall around themselves using cheap, illegal labor, adding an new, ironic meaning to their name.