Category: Top Stories
Prince Elected as New Chairman of Republican National Committee
Reince Priebus, or Prince Rebus as he his known to friends and family, was elected today as Chairman of the Republican National Committee (RNC). The Prince replaces outgoing Chairman, Michael Steele, whose leadership of the RNC has been fraught with…
RNC Funding Calls for Chairman Neuvo, Hold the Mexican
Want to be the next chairman of the Republican National Committee? Take this easy essay test and send it back to the RNC in Washington. Be sure to include all your contact info so we can get in touch if…
Palin Explains Mixup in Map Displayed on SarahPAC Website
“Oh gosh, when I woke up Sunday morning, I was just horrified to see my US map with the gun sites directed at US states and names of lawmakers printed below,” claimed a somewhat contrite Sarah Palin in attempting to…
Obama Signs New Jim Crow Bill into Law
Washington D.C. – Continuing a perfect record of being a doormat for the Neo-Fascists, President Obama signed a reverse civil rights bill into law today. Specifically, the bill addresses the ire of restaurant owners who are tired of serving pesky colored…
Death Panel Initiative Kills Trees Not People
The debate over whether advance care planning is actually another way to describe death panels is rearing its ugly head again since regulation started January 1st. The few folks who are still fuzzy on exactly what the intent of the…
Bush Accepted As Official Court Jester By Obama’s Cabinet
George W. was accepted on as the official court Jester for the Obama cabinet. Appearing before the assembled advisers for the first time, W. had them suppressing giggles as soon as he opened his mouth. “I am pleased as punch…
Openly Gay Soldier Personally Loses War on Terror
Washington 2011: The official cause of America’s loss in the Afghanistan war has been traced to an openly gay soldier. The unidentified soldier, known as “Pretty Tony “ by his fellow soldiers, enlisted soon after the military dropped its opposition…
Barbour Picked as 2012 Favorite, for what Remains to be Seen
Haley Barbour this week catapulted past other GOP Presidential hopefuls, a feat considered all the more amazing by leading physicists since Barbour weighs about 350 pounds. As battle lines form for the 2012 nominating process, consensus among political veterans is…
China is Eating Our Lunch – And It’s Dim-Sum, Dim Bulb
The relief guard approached the other guard as he was on his watch. As usual Cecil’s mind was fixed on some inner scene; his eyes half closed and blank, his face dumb and peaceful like a cow in a field…
Barbour to Develop Decoder Ring for 2012 Run
YAZOO CITY, MS — GlossyNews.com In preparation for announcing his intentions to run for President in 2012, Haley Barbour, Governor of Mississippi, has begun extensive development with the Ovaltine Company of the 2012 Presidential Secret Decoder, much like those in…