Category: Top Stories
Newscasters Normalize their Relations with Our Alien Overlord Tromp
Major media personalities strive to retain their credibility after being forced to appear naked on television by our alien overlord Tromp. Tromp, the mastermind of the invasion from Pluto, created mass panic when he landed in the United States in…
Trump Agrees to Return Alaska to Russia
In a clever, sage move by president elect Donald Trump, Alaska will be returned to Russia on January 21st, 2017. “We stole these lands and they have to go back to their rightful owners.” The United States purchased Alask from…
Presidents & First Ladies: USA Before and After
Here’s a quick guide to how the First Family has changed… between the Obamas and the Trumps!
4 More Reasons Why You Should Join ISIS
A lot of people were offended by the recent Ten Great Reasons to Join ISIS article by Kilroy. I found myself at a bit of a loss to write an even edgier article. However, help is at hand! Notable Moderate…
Have You Ever Thought About Joining ISIS?
NOTE FROM WALLACE RUNNYMEDE: We rarely republish pieces at Glossy News, even though the ‘Glossy News Classics’ occasional series will feature some great work from our back catalogue. But this recent piece was so hilarious, we are publishing it again!…
It Ain’t Over Yet: Post-Election Leak of Clinton’s Secret White Millennial Meetup
The scandalous Clinton leaks continue! Here is the secret transcript of the first two days of November 2016, entitled: ‘Secret DNC Intelligence Briefings.’ November 1, 2016 Two days ago, Hillary Clinton delivered a stunning speech aimed at white millennial voters…
October Surprise from Autism Speaks: They No Longer Want a Cure? (2/2)
Last time: After the Los Angeles Times published an op-ed piece by Steve Silberman that included the analogy between autism speaks and the NAACP that I wrote about above, Liz Feld, Autism Speaks CEO, responded urging the autism community to…
October Surprise from Autism Speaks: They No Longer Want a Cure? (1/2)
WALLACE’S NOTE: Although the following story is about the ‘October Surprise’ from Autism Speaks, the decision in question may have some long term implications. Autism speaks has published a new mission statement: Autism Speaks is dedicated to promoting solutions, across…
Morsi’s Democracy (Song Parody)
This parody of ‘Chinese Democracy’ by Guns ‘n’ Roses is dedicated to everyone who has ever stood up to political Islamists. If the theocrats really do believe hellfire exists, then every moment of their life should be one of the…
Will The Real Donald Trump Please Stand Up?
In early November 2016, Scotland’s first minister, Nicola Sturgeon, expressed more clearly than many other world leaders the hope that Donald Trump, when in office, would be very different from the Donald Trump she had witnessed on the presidential campaign…