Category: Science
An Up Close Look at Australian Animals From Hell
No, I am not going to write about kangaroos. I am not that cheap. Everybody who wants to write funny stories about Australia writes about kangaroos. I refuse to stoop that low. They are too easy a target, too cheap…
Mathematician Accused of Using Imaginary Numbers in Global Warming Report
After a three-week investigation, the Congressional Investigation Committee has unanimously concluded that Kansas mathematician Dr. Bernard Dietrich did intentionally and maliciously use imaginary numbers in the equations used to generate the data in the report he issued a month ago…
Amateur Astronomer finds Hell in Space
It started out as a normal night for amateur astronomer Rick Saty last Wednesday evening. After setting up his 14-inch reflector telescope in his backyard and collimating it (a process in which the lenses are adjusted to bring them all…
Discovery Of Male ‘Penis Brain’ Excites Researchers
Physiological scientists have made an amazing discovery in that man (and we mean specifically ‘man’ here, not ‘wo-man’) much like the dinosaurs of ancient times, possess a second brain located in an extremity of the body. Both man and dinosaurs…
Ancient Greek High School Unearthed
Athens, Greece – GlossyNews.com – Archaeologists digging in the Greek Peloponnese in the region of ancient Sparta have reported the amazing discovery of a virtually intact Spartan high school once attended by at least 100 students. The Spartans were the…
Scientists Discover Rare Pygmy Bigfoots
Vancouver, BC – GlossyNews.com – In what may finally put to rest the perennial “Does Bigfoot exist?” controversy, a team of Canadian scientists from Saskatchewan State College announced Tuesday that it has discovered a race of pygmy Bigfoots living deep…
Drug-Induced Lobotomy Offers Hope for Stress-Plagued Society
Stress is the number one mental problem plaguing society today. Stress can lead to obesity, anorexia, suicide, and color T.V. Did you know that there has been a 20% increase of stress-related spontaneous combustion in April 2011 due only to…
Aliens Abduct Rhode Island, Connecticut Unaware
Woonsocket, RI – GlossyNews.com – In one of the most bizarre UFO events yet recorded, aliens reportedly abducted the entire State of Rhode Island. It happened at 3:15 AM May 10. The entire episode was documented by Barney J. Brothers…
Dung Becomes Newest Clean Energy
Fibrominn, LLC in Benson, Minnesota has the distinction of being the first U.S. power plant fired by turkey droppings in an effort wean the U.S. from fossil fuel to fecal fuel. And the turkeys couldn’t be happier. The plant burns…
Painting of Big Mac Found in Neanderthal Cave
Saint Sozy, France – GlossyNews.com French paleontologists have discovered a Neanderthal cave painting said to represent hands eagerly reaching for a Big Mac, or at least proto-Big Mac, according to the journal, Ancient Discoveries. According to Jean-Claude Bouisquet, curator of…