Categorized | Science, Strange People

Aliens Abduct Rhode Island, Connecticut Unaware

Aliens Abduct Rhode Island, Connecticut Unaware

Woonsocket, RI – – In one of the most bizarre UFO events yet recorded, aliens reportedly abducted the entire State of Rhode Island.

It happened at 3:15 AM May 10. The entire episode was documented by Barney J. Brothers using his cell phone camera and his video has been posted to YouTube, prompting a frenzied worldwide rush to see the video.

According to Mr. Brothers, he was leaving his apartment in Millville, Massachusetts, which borders Rhode Island, for his job as a night watchman, when, he says, “A gigantic flying saucer vaguely resembling a pickup truck began to suck up the whole State of Rhode Island.” Racing to his truck, which coincidentally is a Ford pickup, Mr. Brothers retrieved his cell phone and recorded the entire incident, making this one of the few well-documented alien abduction stories on record.

As seen on the video, the land and entire city of Woonsocket seem to slowly levitate toward the waiting spacecraft, whereupon all are sucked into a vacuum-like tube projecting from the spacecraft’s fuselage, and then disappear from sight.

“There’s no doubt in my mind Rhode Island was picked because of its small size,” notes Brothers. “If they had picked Maine or Pennsylvania the whole spacecraft would have either been weighted down or exploded in midair.”

Brothers, who admits to having had “one or two,” says that while recording the event he accidentally dropped his phone and is very lucky it even still works. Asked by a reporter if what he thinks is Rhode Island being sucked into a spacecraft might actually be his pickup truck as his phone bounced off the sidewalk, Brothers becomes heated.

“That is a hot crock of steaming bull!” he exclaims. “First place, my truck has Massachusetts plates. Second, it’s blue and whatever was sucked up in that spaceship was dark green. And if that’s all not enough, my watch stopped, right at that minute, then started up again after they put Rhode Island back where it’s supposed to be.”

With evidence like that, Mr. Brothers is likely to be taken very seriously by UFO organizations and will no doubt garner a segment on an upcoming “UFO Hunter.”


This post was written by

- who has written 24 posts on

Will Johnson operates several e-commerce websites and writes stage plays in his spare time. Will is editor of


5 Responses to “Aliens Abduct Rhode Island, Connecticut Unaware”

  1. 3rdEye says:

    Video link? Kinda pointless without a link as no one can find it very easily.

  2. rfreed says:

    Too bad they didn’t suction up Illinois and fly away with it. I would have paid them to do that.

  3. P. Beckert says:

    Would that be like a Suction 8?

  4. rfreed says:

    Are you following me around from article to article or something?

  5. P. Beckert says:

    As Trump would say “Thats for me to know and for you to find out.”
    Actually, I’m just trying to squeeze the last bit of funny out of you. It’s a tough job but someone has to do it.


Leave a Reply

We are also looking for a satire editor
and a Clever Photoshop Guru...
We Made a Movie!

Check us out on Kickstarter!

Glossy News Exclusive Exposés

-- (SEE ALL Videos) --

Glossy News Fake Commercials!

More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?

Our Top Authors (last 30-days)

All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial