Month: December 2010
Australian Threatens Entire U.S. With His Publishing Of ‘Secrets”
Damn Rupert Murdoch and his FOX News crap!
Walmart Buys Exclusive Rights to Christmas, Axes Controversial “Jesus”
In a sweeping move today Walmart has bought the entire rights to Christmas and all its accessories. The move is designed to give Walmart control over the popular holiday and to help shore up the retail giant as being the…
Miley Cyrus Bongs are a Hit This Christmas
In this era of economic uncertainty, it’s easy to forget that millionaire child traffickers have it rough sometimes too. So the struggles of Miley Cyrus, Inc. have been a sadly ignored story, supplanted in the news by stuff about families…
Gays in military ask for more fashionable fatigues
Washington, DC – On the high heels of the historic vote to repeal “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” openly gay troops are now pushing for the Pentagon to bring in the top fashion designers to create more stylish uniforms. Dubbing it…
DREAM Act may signal Acronym Deficit
Washington DC is filled with unelected bureaucrats who wield powerful influence behind the scenes, far away from cameras. Glossy News sat down this week with one such powerful, unelected face, retiring Senate Marketing Liaison Bob Barnum. The garrulous, gregarious Barnum…
John Boehner Claims Unemployed Should Work for Their Benefits
Republican House Speaker hopeful, John Boehner, recently commenting on the vote to extend unemployment benefits for the nation’s millions of unemployed workers, claimed that no one in this country should be getting a free ride. “If the unemployed want to…
FBI says Weather Forcaster is Passing Drug Code
CHICAGO —BobZaguy A local Chicago weather forecaster was arrested by the FBI Drug Unit during WFMT’s Friday 10:00 AM local news broadcast. The charge was transmitting drug messages over the public air waves, a federal crime punishable by 5 to…
New Wikileaks Revelations are Worst Yet
It now appears to observers that Wikileaks is a powerful and permanent force in world affairs. The apprehension of founder Julian Asshinge has become a call to arms for hundreds of anonymous kindred spirits. The bell has tolled on the…
President Obama Stars In ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’
President Obama gazed down from the icy bridge into the swirling frigid waters of the Potomac below him. In the darkness of the night the distance between him and its whirlpools seemed vast. He was at an end. The difficulties…
Time’s POTY 2010
SILICON VALLEY — Facebook, the third largest country on planet earth, eclipsed a sizeable number of groups and became TIME‘s Person of the Year–2010. Well, ok, ok —the site didn’t technically win, but its owner, Zuckerberg did win. And that…