Tag Archive | "funny"

ProTip: Cool Overly Hot Coffee by Holding it out the Window (comic)

While this lovely bit of fiction didn’t actually happen with my children, as they graciously allowed me to portray, it did happen with a group of friends about 15 years ago.

J-Dizzle had just taken the wheel, and I’d just picked up the cocoa, and it was scorching hot. He said something like, “simple thermodynamics. Hold it out the window and the passing air will strip the newtons from the cup. Voila, cooler cocoa!” Read the full story


Posted in Top StoriesComments (0)

Fukushima Scientists Dismiss Sightings Of Fire-Breathing Iguanadon

A group of scientists at the Fukushima Nuclear Reactor have angrily denied recent sightings of a 700-foot fire-breathing iguanadon, though they refused to do so on-the-record, leading to further speculation that the monster is very much real.

Scientists at the lab say that the allegations are just a scare mongering tactic. These are also the same scientists who mong three-eyed fish and glowing ground vermin, so they’re testimony is necessarily tempered. Read the full story


Posted in Science, Video NewsComments (0)

Chad Not On Google Maps Due To ‘Lack Of Any Discernable Land Features’

The country of Chad is in an uproar over being missed out completely on the well known Google Maps app, saying that it is an ‘outrage’.

A Google spokesman was quick to defend his company’s inability to represent any part of the central African country, given the fact ‘there’s nothing ***king there’.

Other African Nations were quick to step up in defense of Chad including the one to the north of it, and a couple to the west along the coast. Maybe Ivory Coast or Liberia, but who can be sure. I mean, really, it’s (central?) Africa. Read the full story


Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, Video NewsComments (0)

Man Upset After House Built In Shape Of Toilet

A man in South Korea comes home to find that his dream home has been made into a nightmare, which brought a whole new meaning to the saying “throwing money down the toilet.”

This house, while obviously absurd in shape, is still an architectural wonder. It’s pretty magnificent, and the majority of humans can connect with it, so in that regard alone it’s pretty good.

For more on the story we go to our location correspondent Bob Hunter.

See the rest of the story on YouTube, or scroll down for the video.


Posted in Human Interest, Video NewsComments (0)

Over 86% Of Statistics Are Confusing Say 44% Of Public

A report from the National Research Center reveals that 44% of the public are confused by 86% of statistics published. The vast array of statistics being brought up has generated mass public confusion.

Many modern structures are built, not out of dung, industrial waste and random bits of minerals found along the roadside, but actual constructions materials, thus proving the North Korea is the greatest country that has ever existed, all hail to the pudgy triumvirate.

For more on this breaking news we head to the studio, where 100% facts are generated.

See the rest of the story on YouTube, or scroll down for the video.


Posted in Human Interest, Video NewsComments (1)

Luxembourg Annexes Germany

The European community is in shock following Luxembourg’s decision to deploy troops and annex the Federal Republic of Germany.

According to preliminary reports, Luxembourger troops entered the province of North Rhine-Westphalia early Thursday morning and proceeded through Lower Saxony towards Berlin.

By late Saturday the capitol had surrendered, allowing the invading troops to push south and take Bavaria. Read the full story


Posted in War Zone, World NewsComments (3)

Top GlossyNews.com Articles of 2012

For the first time in our 10+ years of publishing, we’re getting in on the end-of-year “top lists” game with a list of our top 10, well, 30 actually, stories of 2012.

These are broken into three lists. Top Stories of 2012, Top Stories from our Archives, and Top sub-site pages.

Everything is linked, so feel free to click on as many as you like. All links open in new windows. Read the full story


Posted in Internets TubesComments (2)

Yet More CEO Jokes (A Constant Source Of Inspiration)


What is the difference between a CEO and a vulture?

Vultures fly and at least have the decency to wait until you die to eat you.

Why is it not a good idea to raise your kid to be a CEO?

He might get sidetracked into similar work like robbing kids for lunch money or laundering money for a drug cartel. Read the full story


Posted in Biz NewsComments (3)

Ralph Lauren Apologizes to Mitt Romney for Chinese-Made Yarmulke

Ralph Lauren has found himself in another tight spot this weekend when it was revealed that the yarmulkes designed for Romney’s visit to Israel were also made in China. A quick apology was issued when news of the non-kosher yarmulkes was leaked to the media.

Lauren had already left to take a short Sabbatical after it was revealed that the uniforms he designed for the 2012 Olympics were shipped out to China for manufacture. Read the full story


Posted in Biz News, PoliticsComments (3)

Commoners Tell Romneys ‘Screw You and the Dressage Horse You Rode in On’

While the financially elite in London are said to be looking forward to showing Mitt and Ann Romney a jolly good time in London this week, the majority of ordinary Londoners would be just as happy to see the Romneys go elsewhere for what is deceptively being billed as ‘Mitt Romney’s first foreign tour of his candidacy.”

“Screw ‘em and the dressage ‘orse they rode in on,” said Edna Swanscot, a volunteer at the London Olympics, who is primarily in charge of mucking the horse stalls, including the one where Ann Romney’s horse, Refalca, will be stabled during the dressage event.

“Betcha I ain’t gonna get to shake ‘ands with that rotter and ‘e’s wife, even if I clean me ‘ands on me apron first,” she said.

Swanscot’s husband, Earl, agreed “Thems ain’t ‘ere to rub elbows with the likes of us, I’ll say that much. Rather, the wifey’s ‘ere to show off ‘er fancy ‘orse, and ‘er ‘usband’s ‘ere to meet up widdem scoundrels wots from them crooked banks, ‘e is.”

Anticipating the next question, Earl then concluded “Yeah, I realize I ain’t pronouncing my effin’ aiches. It’s you Americans ‘oo want the ‘ole British reality thing, now innit?”


Posted in PoliticsComments (4)

IRS Admits Culpability in Mitt Romney Tax Return Controversy

Rumors are circulating that the IRS is contemplating an audit of Mitt Romney’s tax returns for the years 2002 to present, a full 10 year’s worth of returns. A spokesperson for the IRS claims that Romney’s staunch refusal to provide the returns in order to clear up misconceptions about his business dealings over the past few years has finally raised a red flag for federal auditors. Read the full story


Posted in PoliticsComments (0)

Humor Blog Owes Success to Worldwide Spammers

ROCKY MOUNT, NC – A 37-year old unemployed factory worker turned humor blogger is reportedly thrilled by recent praise his previously unknown humor blog has received. Avowed bachelor and longtime fan of Wheel of Fortune, Buford Quigley told reporters today that he is “as happy as a dead pig in sunshine” over the overwhelming positive response his humor blog is receiving – almost exclusively from internet spammers. Read the full story


Posted in Human Interest, Internets TubesComments (0)

Glossy News Exclusive Exposés

-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --

Glossy News Fake Commercials!

Glossy News Podcast

(Listen on iTunes or Libsyn)

More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?

Our Top Authors (last 30-days)

All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial