Category: Politics
Congress Proposes Replacing 2010 Election w/ “Psychic Estimate” Index
hWashington, DC (GlossyNews): House Speaker, Nancy Pelosi, met with the press and Congressional leaders today to discuss replacing the 2010 mid-term election cycle with a “psychic estimate” of the voters’ true intent. “There are just so many distractions and inherent…
Sarah Palin: So Main Street Joe Six-Pack It’s Scary
Arguably the most appealing characteristic of Sarah Palin is that she’s one of us. She’s not one of those elitists who finished her undergrad degree from just one school, and she doesn’t know what the heck Charlie Gibson is talking…
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Yields McCain Tell-All Backdoor Book
Senator John McCain’s fierce stance against repealing the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” law has brought about speculation of his hatred for homosexuals. While McCain cites the hardships that military members face in Iraq and Afghanistan, many others are accusing the…
John Edwards to Appear on Jerry Springer
In what is hailed as a media coup, former 2008 presidential candidate John Edwards has agreed to an exclusive deal with Jerry Springer Productions. According to Washington insiders, the move is a bold “out of the box” insurgency first step…
Secessionists Pass out Own Survey to Tea Party Attendees
A South Carolina independent rag known as the Secessionist News developed a Survey entitled “Where Do You Stand as a True American?” They hope it will be picked up and answered by lots of Tea Party Convention delegates in an…
Important Convention Announcement by Tea Party Nation
Richmond, VA – As many of you may already know, due to circumstances not entirely out of our control, many of our original sponsors have pulled their support from the first National Tea Party Convention scheduled to take place on…
Sarah Palin “Wants in” on Jesus Rifle Scopes
Upon hearing that Michigan defense contractor, Trijicon, has been supplying the US military with rifle sights inscribed with New Testament Bible passage references on them, Sarah Palin contacted the company’s headquarter offices to try and pull some strings to get…
GOP Expects Death Star Fully Operational Prior to 2012 Elections
Hard-core Republicans, also known in some circles as the ‘Evil Empire’, plan to have their Death Star fully operational by the 2012 election. The Death Star, which is believed to have the capacity to neutralize the minds of an entire…
Sarah Palin Proudly Earns GED — And Real, Not Honorary
Sandpoint, ID (GlossyNews) — Sarah Palin may not be smarter than an inner-city or deep-south fifth grader, but on Friday, she’ll earned something few 5th graders have — a high school diploma; well, a high school equivalency certificate, at any…
Conservatives Quickly Devise Cheap Plan to Counter Obamacare
The conservative parties of America have realized that they need to come up with a new health care system or stand in danger of losing the millions they have invested in the dysfunctional system that is being assailed by the…