Category: Biz News
Rating Agencies Themselves Downgraded
Policy makers have agreed that financial rating agencies are to be reformed. In the expected announcement, the European Parliament said; “The Big Three, Moody’s, Finch and Standard and Poor’s, are now so far behind financial trends that we have no…
Goldman Sachs to Make Money from Young Convicts
Goldman Sachs, the Wall Street investment firm that profited heavily from the world-wide collapse in subprime mortgage bonds, has announced that it will participate in a bold new experiment to apply the principles of greed and the profit motive to…
Corporations Broker Historic Repub/Dem Compromise to Boost U.S. Economy
As unlikely as it may seem in the throes of an increasingly vicious national election, U.S. Republicans and Democrats appear to be in agreement on providing a major stimulant to the economy – the elections themselves. Now that corporations are…
Yet More CEO Jokes (A Constant Source Of Inspiration)
CEO JOKES 3- WHY DO THEY SEEM TO BE AN ENDLESS SOURCE OF MATERIAL? What is the difference between a CEO and a vulture? Vultures fly and at least have the decency to wait until you die to eat you….
Supreme Court Protects Corporations’ Right to Bear Arms
Washington D.C. – Today the Supreme Court upheld Corporations’ Second Amendment Rights. This decision comes in the wake of the much controversial decision, FEC v. Citizens United, where the Court upheld corporations First Amendment rights to free speech by striking…
Wall Street Puzzled as Starbucks Expands Into Hospice
SEATTLE, WA. At their annual shareholders meeting in Seattle last week, Starbucks Coffee Company made the startling announcement of a new alliance between Starbucks and the Hospice Foundation of America. Starbucks CEO, Howard Schultz, told an excited latte-infused crowd of…
Greek Economic Collapse Could Have Knock-On Effect for Other Not-America Countries
ATHENS, GREECE – As votes continue to be counted in the Greek general election, worries continue to mount that the fallout from the country’s potential economic collapse could have a knock-on effect for many other not-America countries. Should Greece fail…
Ralph Lauren Apologizes to Mitt Romney for Chinese-Made Yarmulke
Ralph Lauren has found himself in another tight spot this weekend when it was revealed that the yarmulkes designed for Romney’s visit to Israel were also made in China. A quick apology was issued when news of the non-kosher yarmulkes…
Copyright Take-Down: Mount Olympus Forced to Change its Name in Honor of London 2012
LONDON–The International Olympic Committee announced its plans yesterday to change the name of the historic site of the gods, previously known as Mount Olympus, to Mount Samsung in honor of the upcoming Olympic Games. Other famous names that have come…
Exclusive interview with Chase CEO Jaime Dimon
EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH JP MORGAN CHASE CEO JAIME DIMON by Derisive Duck senior business editor. Derisive Duck: “Mr. Dimon, may I call you Jaime?” Dimon: “No.” DD: “Please explain to our readers, Mr. Dimon, how your bank could lose more…