Category: Strange People
Glenn Beck Defeated by Boycott, Ratings, Sensibilities
Dramatic drops in ratings combined with a lack of any reputable (top-of-market-paying) advertiser willing to be part of his show have finally taken their toll on Glenn Beck and his FOXNews program. Beck offered a rare olive branch, saying, “…I…
Englishman Shares Home With 240 “Intimacy” Dolls
Cyril Knowles 52, of Wembley is a happily married man. Yet he shares his modest home with 240 sex dolls of all shapes, sizes and colors. Strangely, Mrs Knowles helps him to dress and undress his silicone legion, and even…
Why Gaddhafi Should be Made the US President
With all the problems we have in the U.S. today, it is truly astounding that a simple answer to them exists already and no one has thought of it. Simply make Muammar Gaddhafi the President of the U.S.! The logic…
Bigfoot Activity Heightened During Solar Flare Event
Mt. Clemens, MICHIGAN – The city of Mt. Clemens, Michigan is once again in the news for Bigfoot sightings as it seems that several citizens have phoned the local police station claiming to have witnessed what they believe are large,…
Ghost of Les Paul Haunts Pete Townsend of The Who
Pete Townsend, guitarist extraordinaire for The Who, wasn’t the first artist to destroy a musical instrument on stage. Jerry Lee Lewis is said to have destroyed a few pianos by setting fire to them, Jimi Hendrix destroyed a few guitars…
Jared Loughner Named Newest NRA Poster Boy
Jared Loughner has been chosen the poster boy of the year for the NRA–the Nutso Retard Association of America. The minute his mugshot hit the press, the top officials of the organization were unanimous in saying “That’s our boy! He’s…
Barbour to Develop Decoder Ring for 2012 Run
YAZOO CITY, MS — GlossyNews.com In preparation for announcing his intentions to run for President in 2012, Haley Barbour, Governor of Mississippi, has begun extensive development with the Ovaltine Company of the 2012 Presidential Secret Decoder, much like those in…
Boy 14, Cracks Skull in Attempt to Board Hogwarts Express
London, England (Glossy News) – Paramedics arrived at London King’s Cross Railway Station on September 1st at 11:13 a.m. after a teenage boy of fourteen years cracked his scull in an attempt to get to platform 9¾ from the very…
Local Satirist Found Dead; Fowl Play Suspected
DUNCAN, OK (Glossynews)– A local satire writer has been found dead in front of his home from multiple gunshot wounds. The assault apparently took place late last night. Police aren’t releasing any information, but several alleged eyewitnesses who prefer to…
Driver Shaving Bikini Line Charged with “Unfortunate Accident”
TAMPA, Fla. (Glossy News) — A Florida woman on her way to visit her boyfriend had an accident on busy US Highway 1 today. Investigating officers say the accident occurred while the driver was temporarily distracted giving herself a bikini…