Category: Society
State Mottos Change in Several States This Year to Attract Tourism
States are constantly re-inventing themselves this time of year, vying for tourist dollars. The better the state motto on license plates and brochures, the more interest they can garner, which translates into more visitors come spring and summer. Still, some…
Pot and Bongo Fest Expected to Draw Huge Crowds
The First Annual Pot and Bongo Fest scheduled to be held this year is expected to draw huge crowds from all over the world. “Since this is the first festival in the country featuring legalized marijuana, we can’t put a…
The NRA to Use ‘Puppy Eyes’ to Win Favor In Public Debate
The NRA in its constant quest for keeping up a good image of itself, keeping guns in as many hands as possible, controlling the minds of the public and keeping a stranglehold on Congress has developed a new methodology for…
North Carolina Cracks Down on Plumber’s Crack
State representatives of North Carolina have introduced a bill that, if passed, would “clarify” an already existing state law to prohibit the display of butt cracks. The proposed legislation, House Bill (_!_), would make it a Class Preparation H felony…
Morons Protest Lack of Equality
Local news is reporting that traffic has been shut down in Washington, D.C. after a new protest movement took to the streets to demand equality legislation for morons. The massive throng of over 1 million morons arrived on Constitution Avenue…
Cents and Sensibility (Though Neither of Either)
Singles seeking sensibility over sexuality crashed newbie dating site Pension Singles just thirty minutes into its Valentine’s Day launch. Hailed as the middle class man (or woman’s) Millionaires Match, the newbie Internet matchmaker promises quality matches between those who slaved…
Should Ecstasy Be Legalized? Counterpoint Debate
There are many drugs terrorizing our nation, from low-cost heroine and crack to high-potency crystal meth. One drug equally vilified that gets a bit less attention is Ecstasy, known by its chemical name MDA or MDMA. MDMA was first synthesized…
Have Americans discovered the secret to happiness?
His Excellency, Lyoncho Karma Tobgye, Minister of Happiness in the Kingdom of Bhutan, asked to meet me because of my reputation for telling the truth while avoiding or inventing facts, which is the opposite of most journalists. Here is a…
Minnesota Misguidedly Manufactures Misleading Mexican Meals Making Millions Mad
I recently bought a burrito and was astounded to see that it was made in the fair city of Minneapolis, a surprise since I had always thought of Minneapolis as being a place so white that it’s nickname is ‘The…
PhD Thesis Lists “Yahoo Answers” as Source
MIT has become embroiled in a massive academic scandal after the discovery that one of its PhD students’ thesis utilized Yahoo Answers as a source. Although details are still murky, sources inside the university claim PhD candidate Phillip Kwon inserted…