Category: Kidz Zone
Letters from Summer Camp
Glossy News, never too low to find new sources of information for you news hungry clowns, found the following letters in a number of trash cans throughout Beverly Hills: Hi Mommy, Greetings from Camp Wigwam. Did you know how dangris…
Alternative Gifting Ideas for Your Single Dad
Ok, kids, let’s look at the whole gift-giving thing for dad on Father’s Day in a completely different light. Face it, your dad has all the ties he needs, it’s summertime and therefore, too hot for slippers or a robe,…
Glenn Beck to Develop Children’s Show on Fox
NEW YORK, NY (GlossyNews) — In an effort to reel in kiddies as early as they are able to watch television, the Fox Channel has begun the process of developing a Saturday morning kids’ show featuring Glenn Beck, invoking a…
Kansas Dad Somehow Lifts Car Off 6-Year-Old Girl
SHAWNEE, KS (GlossyNews) — A Kansas mother is praising neighbor Nick Harris as “Superman” after her six-year-old daughter described how Harris found the strength to lift a car off her. The girl escaped with minor injuries after she was pinned…
Three-Year-Old Shoots Father: “Purple Dinosaur Told Me To”
ANAHEIM, CA (GlossyNews) — On March 17, 2010, a three-year-old boy shot his father, an LAPD officer, with a service revolver. The shooting occurred in the family’s pickup truck at a traffic stop in Anaheim. Investigators are still trying to…
Teen’s Math Jokes Fail to Score
APPLETON, WI (GlossyKidsNews) – Despite attempts of wooing potential dates with dazzling wit and humor, Appleton East High School sophomore and champion “mathlete” Jon Henderson, appears to be striking out at love. “Girls should be throwing themselves at me after…
Father/Son Bonding Often Causes Permanent Scarring
Testors and Testes. To this day, those words are interchangeably linked in my mind, and so, I was ill prepared for the terror they would again conjure when my son, who just turned eight years old, asked the inevitable question,…
New EUSSR Questionnaire – for Five-Year-Olds
The latest Kafkaesque directive to be launched by the Brussels-based E-USSR is a super-intrusive questionnaire to be completed by the parents of 5-year old children who are ready to start school. The dystopic European Bully Boy state’s interrogation sheet contains…
Mall Santas to Goldman Sachs: Hand Over the Vaccine
New York, NY – In a jolly but firm tone, the Association of Mall Santas (AMS) has issued a formal demand to Wall Street giant Goldman Sachs to hand over all their doses of the swine flu vaccine to the…
Robo-Rat: the Future of Service-Free Pets
Worried about getting your youngsters a pet for Christmas – a cuddly kitten or puppy –then face the moral conscience dilemma of having to go and dump it up the arse end of the wilderness a few weeks later –…