Author: rfreed
Moose Take Aim on Chickenhawk Ted Nugent
POINT BARROW, Alaska (GlossyNews) — Local Alaskan law enforcement agencies were shocked recently to learn of a plot by local moose to do in redneck rocker Ted Nugent during a concert here. The normally quiet, vegetarian moose have been in…
Fatwa Declared Against GlossyNews Writer
LONDON, UK (GlossyNews) — A Fatwa has been declared against GlossyNews as a reaction to the thousands of articles ridiculing the Taliban, suicide bombers, Muslim clerics, Islamic law and a host of other things that seem strange and humorous to…
Far Right Kicks Off ‘Cheney For Dictator’ Campaign
UNDISCLOSED LOCATION in Northern Southern Wyoming (GlossyNews) — The wheels are already grinding under the Dick Cheney for Dictator campaign of 2012. The former President of Vice of the United States announced his candidacy at a meeting of Corporations For…
Acme Corporation Profits from BP Spill Efforts
Acme Corporation is reporting a huge profit upswing this month. Acme is the chief supplier of underwater doo-dads for BP Corporation, the sponsors of what is now the largest oil spill ever, on wonder why they are the biggest, they…
‘The Onion’ Publishes an Issue of True Stories
Foxpeter Grove, MD (GlossyNews) — The Onion, America’s premier satire and humor newspaper, shocked the literary world today by publishing an issue of ABSOLUTELY TRUE STORIES! The US’s flagship smart-ass site today reported on several newsworthy incidents that actually happened….
France, Tired Of American Jokes, Takes Back Statue Of Liberty.
Paris, France – France, tired of taking all the crap that it has gotten from the U.S., has retaliated by taking back the Statue of Liberty, once a gift from them. Ever since Bush started the Iraqi war and called…
Icelanders Have Their Revenge, By Odin
Reykjavik, Iceland (GlossyNews) — Hammered by massive financial debts to Europe and Britain in particular, Iceland has come up with a hammer of its own to strike back with. Returning to its traditional religious roots and the old gods of…
2012 – The Year The Women Took Over
Glossy News Future Take: Year 2024 — Most political analysts look upon the 2012 Obama-Palin campaign as the start of the anarchy that now besets us. Originally known as the second Obama-McCain campaign, Palin soon eclipsed her boss in popularity…
When Free Cheese Isn’t Socialism
By the fireplace — I have a friend who is an unusual case in point for our present national attitudes. Let us call him ‘Sam’. If I used his real name, and he found out, he would be hurt and…
Palin Reports Russian Peeping Toms
Wasilla, Ak (GlossyNews) — Sarah Palin, potential candidate for the Presidency in 2012, has put in a complaint with the Alaskan State Troopers complaining of Russians peeping in her windows at night. As she once claimed that she “could see…