Palin Arrested in Pre-Dawn Raid on Wasilla
Following a blitzkrieg pre-dawn raid on her rural Anchorage six bedroom igloo, involving ice picks, hot air guns and a flamethrower, a Homeland Security strike force this morning arrested failed Republican VP wannabe Sarah Palin on charges of subversion, domestic…
A Real Look into Impoverished America: drugs, Prostitution & Violence
A real look into the impoverished areas of America: their drug use, prostitution, violence… and why they happen! Written from my own personal working experience… It takes someone who has really hardened his or her heart to integrate into some…
Tiger Woods Played 9 Holes Sunday Morning
Later in the day, he took in a round of golf.
Zhu Zhu Pet Toymakers in Deep Zhu Zhu
Makers of this year’s most popular children’s toys, the Zhu Zhu Pet, are doing everything they can to avoid a recall of the toy after a report issued by Good Guide indicates that the toys contain a potentially dangerous amount…
Country Still Thinking with Its Penis
Washington DC (with reports from elsewhere) — Almost since time has been recorded, “mine’s bigger than yours”, or m-b-t-y, has been on the lips of every aggressive type-A male in the United States. Our country’s presidents are no exception. Sometimes…
Khymer Henchman Claims Genocide ‘Hard Work’, Demands Freedom
Former Khmer Rouge prison chief Douche Bagg today shocked the UN-funded war crimes tribunal by demanding to be released on the final day of his trial for crimes against humanity, shoplifting and double parking in a restricted zone. The UN’s…
Live Guinea Pigs Used to Test Safety of Zhu Zhu Pets
In an ironic twist of fate, the very animals that Zhu Zhu Pets are fashioned after are being used to test the toxic levels of antimony in the fur and noses of the popular Christmas toy, and the live pets…
O’Reilly Interviews God, Tells Him To ‘Shut Up’
In a controversial incident on Fox News, Bill O’Reilly was interviewing God, asking how the Almighty could come to allow the Democrats to run both the Senate and White House. During God’s attempt to explain that he had to be…
Modern Day Pilgrims Live off the Landfill
The first annual general meeting of the self-styled Freegan’s Society was held this weekend amid the sprawling sand dunes at Scroungeford-on-Sea, culminating in a four-course banquet prepared from waste food that the local garbage tip’s rats and seagulls had disdained…
PM Brown Goes Ga-Ga on Tweeter
Sarah Brown’s Tweeter followers were baffled earlier this week when the Prime Monster’s long-suffering wife “twatted” a random set of letters that even caused cryptologists at the UK’s super secret Bletchley Park ‘el-int ‘ spy centre to scratch their heads…