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Israel’s Mushroom Cloud Emanates from Ehud Barak

Israel’s Mushroom Cloud Emanates from Ehud Barak

Israeli Defence Minister Barak (Hey – coincidence or what – he and the all-new American President share a common name) has voiced Tel Aviv’s concern about the positive progress in talks between Iran, the IAEA and major world powers on Tehran’s purported weapons of mass distraction program in Vienna this week. Continue Reading

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Congress: Health Care Reform to be Funded by Mysterious Nigerian Prince

Congress: Health Care Reform to be Funded by Mysterious Nigerian Prince

Washington, DC: Congressional Representatives from both sides of the aisle celebrated today with the announcement of an offer to completely fund American health care reform via e-mail from a mysterious Nigerian prince.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi told reporters at a Capitol Hill news conference, initial contact with Prince D’Uod Mababe was made by Pelosi herself. Continue Reading

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CIA Funding Tech, Linguistics, Some Iranian Terrorist Groups

CIA Funding Tech, Linguistics, Some Iranian Terrorist Groups

The United States military hawks have thrown their hands up and cried “Time Out!” as they hotly deny accusations of having played a role in a deadly terrorist suicide bombing in southeast Iran.

“We condemn this act of terrorism and mourn the loss of innocent lives – honest – cross my heart and hope to die,” State Department spokesman Sheldon Weaselberg declared – just before dropping stone dead – in a statement to a group of media reporters who looked stupid or gullible enough to still believe anything the US government says. Continue Reading

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Obama Throws Down Twitter Challenge

Obama Throws Down Twitter Challenge

New York/Washington Video Cam PR Conference —Today, in a remarkable change of all the GOP’s previous protocols and party planning pow-wows, GOP Head Tit (some say ‘teat’) Rush Limbaugh and Sen. John Boehner aired the first of their many planned video conferences to the public and the mainstream media. Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics5 Comments

New Labour Stealth Taxes Locked n’ Loaded

New Labour Stealth Taxes Locked n’ Loaded

Secret Labour stealth taxes – rumoured to have been conjoured and drafted by old rodent features himself – Lord Peter Scandalson – aka Vermin in Ermine – are geared up to be imposed on millions of homes and totally bankrupt the middle classes in the process after the no-hoper dead duck government supposedly sweep the ballot in the next General Election. Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, World News0 Comments

Jukebox Politician Bribed by Ukraine Oligarch

Jukebox Politician Bribed by Ukraine Oligarch

Tony Bliar, the firm favourite of his brown-nosing lackeys and stooges to become Europe’s first president now the numpty Irish have ratified the dodgy Treaty of Lisbon, is once again mired in scandal and stands accused of accepting millions of pounds in bribes from a Russian rhubarb zillionaire campaigning for the Banana Republic of the Ukraine to join the European Union. Continue Reading

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America’s Health Insurers Blow Millions on High Priced Hook

America’s Health Insurers Blow Millions on High Priced Hook

Just when you thought America’s health insurance companies couldn’t kick us any harder in the collective ass, comes the news that the insurance industry has paid coo-coo bucks for a study which says that if the present proposed health care bill is passed through legislation, it will be the cause for existing insurance premiums to rise. Say wha? Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Politics2 Comments

UN Official Fired – For Telling Truth

UN Official Fired – For Telling Truth

The top UN official recently fired from his post for the unforgivable crime of telling the truth and criticising Afghanistan’s presidential election has publicly castigated the entire UN mission in the country. Peter Galbraith informed the Neo-Colonial Gazette the $300 zillion per annum mission – employing several thousand personnel – is now “leaderless” and summed up the UN special envoy as an ‘egoistic dog wanker’. Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, Top Stories2 Comments

Obama So Good at Failing Wars, Wins Nobel Peace Prize

Obama So Good at Failing Wars, Wins Nobel Peace Prize

President Barack Obama looks to be in a bit of a pickle – regardless of being awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for being top dog of the world’s most belligerent nation – next to Israel.

If he doesn’t sanction the dispatch of the extra 40,000 troops his military commander in Afghanistan – General Billy Bob McTwattie – has requested to replace the ones the Taliban keep snuffing then the GOP Republican hawks are ready to paint him as a spineless dove who’s Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, Top Stories, War Zone2 Comments

Dems Desperately Seek to Cave to House Repubes [Sick]

Dems Desperately Seek to Cave to House Repubes [Sick]

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, head puppet mistress of the larger of our nation’s two great houses, may have injured a lumbar disc in session yesterday as she attempted to bend over backwards far enough for house minority Republicans to administer their hot dose of “values” down her throat from the back. Democrats these days are not just in power or empowered, their in an unusual position of power… to the minority Republicans, who whip them about like impotent children. Continue Reading

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Rodent Rodham Clinton Boosts US Neo-Imperialism in Africa

Rodent Rodham Clinton Boosts US Neo-Imperialism in Africa

US Secretary of Sleaze Hilarious Rodent Clinton’s eleven-day tour of Darkest Africa took in seven AIDS-ravaged countries across the malfunctional continent. Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, World News1 Comment

Congress Recognizes Its Own Bipartisan Sexuality (Bisexuality?)

Congress Recognizes Its Own Bipartisan Sexuality (Bisexuality?)

Washington DC – The studies have been released and the news sure isn’t pretty. Both houses of Congress – the Senate and the Representatives– have been shown to come up short dealing with their own bisexuality. Continue Reading

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UK Attorney-General to Prosecute Self – Que?

UK Attorney-General to Prosecute Self – Que?

British Slime Minister Gordon ‘Incapability’ Brown and his merry band of sycophantic bottom feeders at No 10 Downing Street today pronounced to an unruly mob of scandal-frenzied hacks from the Daily Shitraker and the Rumourmonger’s Gazette that they maintained “full confidence” in Attorney General Baroness Scumland of Walthamstow amid claims she illegally employed a Pacific Islands shemale – allegedly not permitted to work in the UK as her main educational and skills qualifications for visa entitlement came under the headings of ‘paddling dugout canoes’, ‘making ‘lei’ garlands of jasmine flowers’ and ‘collecting coconuts’. Continue Reading

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Libyan Nut-Job Enthralls UN Assembly w/ Rambling Yarn

Libyan Nut-Job Enthralls UN Assembly w/ Rambling Yarn

It was meant to be a day of global reconciliation, when the new Kenyan Messiah of the Free World (sic) would miraculously wipe clean the slate of the past eight years of Neo-Colonial Imperialist US hatred and herald an era of unity and brotherly love under the New World Order’s military-industrial Zionist jackboot. Continue Reading

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Palin to Cook eBay Auction $63.5K Fundraiser Dinner

Palin to Cook eBay Auction $63.5K Fundraiser Dinner

WASILLA, ALASKA — A woman defense contractor in Huntsville, Ala., won the “Dangerous” Dining with Sarah Palin eBay auction — her bid was $63,500.

Auction details only allow the winning bidder to bring three friends to the dinner. Palin’s spokeswoman said “the former Governor and former First Dude Todd are thrilled that, above all, our wounded warriors are being recognized and honored, and will receive all of the leftover stew. It is a small token of appreciation for their sacrifices on behalf of our great nation.” Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, Strange People1 Comment

CIA Playing Hardball with Obama

CIA Playing Hardball with Obama

In an exclusive interview with the Washington Times, a senior CIA official said the Agency was in payback mode with the White House.

Insisting he be referred to only as “Leon P” to protect his identity, the official revealed that CIA officers were furious when the President unleashed the Justice Department on the Agency over torture allegations. Continue Reading

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