Category: Sports Events
Rose Bowl Parade Officials Cancel N. Korean Army Marching Deal
Pasadena, CA – Rose Bowl Parade officials sent an official notice to members of the elite North Korean Army’s precision marching corp. The letter gave notice that due to recent international nuclear tensions, the participation of the 10,000 man North…
Brazil Economists Say Brazil Loss is Victory for Brazil Economy
RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil (GlossySports) -– While almost every Brazilian is saddened by the stunning loss of their team to the Netherlands in the quarter-final match, economists in Brazil are celebrating unabashedly, claiming that the loss has a decidedly silver…
Winter Olympics Surprisingly Teach Americans Geography
The Winter Olympics in Vancouver have obviously taught us all some important lessons about bobsled safety and 40 million dollar opening ceremonies. However, some Americans are learning more than they ever expected from the Olympic coverage. Americans, globally renowned for…
Former Singer/Drug Addict Bobby Brown Wins X-Games 14 Snowboarding Medal
ASPEN, Colorado — R&B sensation Bobby Brown left a successful stint with New Edition in 1987 to pursue a solo career, which garnered him a string of Top 10 Billboard hits and a Grammy Award. But Brown’s increasingly bizarre behavior…
2010 Winter Olympics — Sold Out to the Highest Bidder?
This scene was captured by one of our authors last week, but we can’t publish it under her name because she was subsequently disqualified for using performance enhancing substances. We will still publish it, but we can’t give her credit,…
All White-All American Sports Venues Outlaw Ethnic Snacks
With the advent of all white, American-only teams in the near future, many sports venues have followed suit by removing any snacks that originated in any country other than America. That means, hamburgers, originally from Hamburg, Germany and hot dogs,…
Waterboarding Added To Olympics For ’10
IOC Headquarters, Switzerland – In a little-known press conference outside the offices of the International Olympics, The President of the International Olympic Committee (IOC), Jacques Rogge, announced that after long consideration and research with the UN and throughout the world,…
Building Overtakes Basketball… Poms Excel
The Women of Notre Dame officially opened their basketball season on the 15th against unranked University of Arkansas-Pine Bluff at the newly renovated Purcell Pavilion of the Joyce Athletic and Convocation Center. The 102 to 57 rout of UAPB was…
Phillies Fan Flogs Golly for Tickets
An American woman charged with offering sex in exchange for World Series baseball tickets maintains she has committed no crime nor done anything wrong by flogging her golly on the internet. “I’m not embarrassed about my actions but I’m effin’…
Flight Wins 23rd Annual Eau Claire–St. Cloud Corn Maze
Minneapolis, MN — An Airbus A320 jet flown by a Northwest Airlines pilot and co-pilot have won the 23rd Annual Eau Claire—St. Cloud Corn Maze Run. The oldest airplane corn maze in the western world announced NWA Flight 188 were…