Category: Society
Famously Tall Playground Delights Children, Actuarials
In the heart of the coolest part of Missoula, Montana, and I assure you such a place can and does exist, is a playground park like no other I’ve ever seen. When I say it’s the tallest playground ever, I…
Fir Trees Being Kidnapped Mysteriously Around The World
Thousands of fir trees have been mysteriously disappearing from forests around the Western world in the last few weeks. Forest rangers making their rounds have been shocked to find many conifers, mostly young ones between three and six feet tall,…
‘No Hoodies’ Policy vs ‘Old Time Religion’
The draconian dipshit management of Monty Mamon’s Shopping Arcade at Skidrow-on-Sea have come under severe criticism due their inflexible ‘No Hoodies’ policy. The rigid enforcement of the regulation resulted in a detail of psychopathic Albanian immigrant Gestapo wannabes – on…
Ask Hank – Battle over Basement Bunker Becomes Brouhaha
Dear Hank, I have a serious issue that needs addressed. I’m a conservative, belong to the NRA and have just finished my bunker cause we all know what’s coming in 2012. My damn wife wants to decorate the damn thing…
Switzerland to Ban Muslim Minarets
Conservative moderate Swiss voters turned out en masse to support a referendum proposal banning the building of any more Islamic minarets. More than 75% of voters and 22 out of 26 cantons voted in favor of the ban – with…
Cannibals say ‘Sorry’ for Eating Vicar
A man whose English great-great-great grandfather was murdered then marinated in a hickory sauce for two days before being barbequed and eaten by South Pacific cannibals has taken part in a unique reconciliation ritual on their home island. In the…
Embrace it and Celebrate it: AIDS in Shelby County TN
In the city of Memphis, it is not a rare thing to walk through the streets and be completely blown away at the filth found lurking around every grotesque corner. Men, women, and teenagers alike are using their bodies as…
Salvation Army: More Bell Ringers Going Mad This Season
The Salvation Army has reported a higher than normal number of Christmas bell ringers going mad this holiday season. Every year there are always a few who go loopy from the constant ringing of their little hand bells and the…
Chocolate-Face “Hershey Guy” Makes Race Accusation
I’m not a racist and I know that because I don’t know what racism is. I have friends who run, friends who don’t run, and friends who don’t even appreciate running. That’s about the extent of my understanding of “the…
Cheney Chases “Party of the Past” Out of His Closet
[UNDSCL’D] DELAWARE, WY – He may be the wise-ass who shoots his friend in the face; true, but he’s OUR friend-face-shooting wise-ass… If you turn 180° from that public persona, you get this touching story about his childhood that he…