Posted in Politics

GA Exit Polls Show Honey Boo Boo Leading Twinkies

GlossyNews.com – GEORGIA – Exit polls conducted throughout the state of Georgia are showing reality TV starlet and shaved Gremlin Honey Boo Boo holding a slight lead over the well known snack Twinkies in the race for the White House….

WTF?! Click now to find out more! GA Exit Polls Show Honey Boo Boo Leading Twinkies
Posted in Politics

Gary Johnson Ahead 99 pts Among Non-Voters

GlossyNews.com – OHIO – In a stunning revelation, Libertarian Party candidate Gary Johnson is leading the nation by 99 points among people who have not voted, will not vote, or for other legal reasons cannot vote. “So you mean this…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Gary Johnson Ahead 99 pts Among Non-Voters
Posted in Politics

Romney Ahead 99 Pts Among Those Who Think Twinkies are Vegetables

GlossyNews.com – CINCINNATI – The latest exit polls are showing Mitt Romney is leading President Obama by an estimated 99 points among voters who think Twinkies are a vegetable. The results would have actually been 100% but when one Romney…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Romney Ahead 99 Pts Among Those Who Think Twinkies are Vegetables
Posted in Politics

Republicans Demand NASCAR Observers at Polling Places

GlossyNews.com – TALLADEGA – Republicans in The Deep South are demanding that NASCAR officials be sent to all polling places to ensure a fair election. Talladega Republican Party Chairman Larry “big cheese” Nelson said, “We can’t risk our people not…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Republicans Demand NASCAR Observers at Polling Places
Posted in Politics

Romney Promises to Stop Gorbachev from Building Catapult

GlossyNews.com – BOSTON – In a last ditch effort to win over undecided voters, Mitt Romney today promised to stop a former leader of a defunct country from building an archaic weapon capable of hitting a non-existent state. At his…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Romney Promises to Stop Gorbachev from Building Catapult
Posted in Politics

Republicans Crucify Jesus for Offering Free Healthcare

BILOXI – People were shocked when a strange light was seen in the sky yesterday. Many wondered if it was a meteor. However, the light that fell to earth was none other than Jesus Christ himself. The Christian leader landed…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Republicans Crucify Jesus for Offering Free Healthcare
Posted in World News

North Korea Develops Slingshot Capable of Reaching North Korea

SEOUL – North Korea’s official news agency today announced the development of a highly advanced slingshot capable of hitting its own territory or fifty feet, whichever comes first. North Korean leader Kim Jong-un spent time touring the new facility which…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! North Korea Develops Slingshot Capable of Reaching North Korea
Posted in Politics

Big Bird Talks Mitt Romney in Hard Hitting Interview

He’s every kid’s favorite bird. Big Bird has been a staple on American television since 1969. So it was no surprise that many Americans became upset when Mitt Romney made public his plan to fire the icon. We met at…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Big Bird Talks Mitt Romney in Hard Hitting Interview
Posted in Gadgets & Gizmos

Review of Motorola’s Amazing DynaTac 8000

First off I want to thank Motorola for sending me this phone. I know they are having a hard time keeping these in stock due to popular demand. To start with, I plugged the DynaTac into my clothes dryer outlet…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Review of Motorola’s Amazing DynaTac 8000
Posted in Talky Pictures

Looper Movie Review

Looper is an amazing movie. Though you have to see the first one to make much sense of it, newcomers will be pleasantly surprised as well. Looper is set in a fantastic world filled with trees and blue people. These…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Looper Movie Review
Posted in Celebrity Gossip

Gwen Stefani’s Belly Button Demands More Money

LOS ANGELES – According to TMZ, Gwen Stefani’s belly button has started intense negotiations with the singer in an attempt to receive more compensation. Despite doing absolutely nothing except being attached to Stefani’s body, the belly button (which is asking…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Gwen Stefani’s Belly Button Demands More Money
Posted in World News

Pakistani Jazz Band ‘Cock Disturbance’ Jailed for Blasphemy

ISLAMABAD – Pakistani police have arrested all four members of an Islamabad based jazz band named Cock Disturbance for blasphemy. The group was arrested after performing an impromptu concert in a mosque where they called for the resignation of Pakistani…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Pakistani Jazz Band ‘Cock Disturbance’ Jailed for Blasphemy
Posted in Sports

Regular NFL Refs Die From Shock After Being Cheered

Baltimore, MD – NFL players, coaches, and fans were stunned when all seven officials died from apparent shock after receiving a standing ovation and roaring cheers for returning to their first game after a four month long lockout. The chaos…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Regular NFL Refs Die From Shock After Being Cheered
Posted in Politics

Republicans Vote to Repeal Libya

Washington D.C. – Republican lawmakers today voted to repeal the country of Libya from the world for “causing too much trouble.” House Majority Leader Eric Cantor held up a map, pointed to what he thought was Libya and proposed legislation…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Republicans Vote to Repeal Libya
Posted in Politics

Romney Proposes Two Week Term Limit on Facts

Dayton, OH – Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney today announced a controversial plan to place term limits on facts. During a campaign stop in Ohio, Romney was overheard telling a Koch brother that if elected he will immediately propose placing…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Romney Proposes Two Week Term Limit on Facts
Posted in Politics

Romney Plans to Live in Large Uterus Instead of White House

Toledo, OH – Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney unveiled his plan to move himself and his family into a “uterus of suitable size and structure” if elected president. He made the announcement during a speech at a Toledo go-kart manufacturing…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Romney Plans to Live in Large Uterus Instead of White House
Posted in Gadgets & Gizmos

Apple Announces New Rainbow-Crapping Unicorn

Cupertino, CA – Apple Inc. today announced the next generation of their rainbow-crapping unicorn, the “Rainbow-Crapping Unicorn 5.” The name surprised the entire unicorn-blogging world after wide speculation that the latest Rainbow-Crapping Unicorn would be called the Rainbow-Crapping Unicorn 6…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Apple Announces New Rainbow-Crapping Unicorn
Posted in Politics

Republicans to Change Symbol from Elephant to Jesus Holding a Shotgun

Washington D.C. – In what many are calling a sign of the Republican Party’s desperation, Republican National Committee chairman Reince Priebus today announced that the long standing symbol of the Republican Party, the elephant, is being replaced by an image…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Republicans to Change Symbol from Elephant to Jesus Holding a Shotgun