Author: Brian White
Michele Bachman, Unaware of Y2k, Attacks Bill Clinton
CROOKSTON, Minnesota (GlossyNews) — The Republican Party, frequently criticized for being behind the times and completely devoid of new ideas, has taken yet another strategy from Newt Gingrich’s 1994 GOP Playbook. Michele Bachmann, one of the most prominent she-publican fundraisers,…
World Stunned as Speidi Goes 36-hours without Press Release
Rwandan General Killed Millions, Accepted Christ, Welcomed to Heaven
Due to what some non-theists like to call a “gaping hole in theism”, General Mbutu Ngariao, perhaps best known as the Rape General, third in command during the Rwandan genocide, has been able to eleventh-hour-apologize and slip his way into…
Newlywed Husband Uses Scripture to Write-Off Premature Performance
Jason Margwalter, or Talahasee, Florida, recently wed his highschool sweetheart. Since both of them had saved themselves for marriage, allegedly, they had high expectations for their wedding night. Not all went quite to plan, according to new bride Nichole, but…
Tim Minchen Funniest Thing out of Australia Since Boxing Kangaroos
Not to impune the comedic gold that is the phenomena of the impractical uselessness of the boomerang, nor the clever brilliance of Clarke & Dawe, but Tim Minchin (Wikipedia or TimMinchin.com) is as funny as anyone you’ll see, as musically…
Comedy Central Pseudo News Anchor and Pundit Confirm DC Rally
On September 16th, Jon Stewart officially announced the Million Moderate March, a “Rally to Restore Sanity”. The event will coincide with Stephen Colbert’s “Stephen Colbert – March to Keep Fear Alive!” rally. This means the passionate, coordinated campaigns of Reddit…
Colbert’s Nation Rallies for War, Raises Battle Capital
There’s little debating the power of Stephen Colbert and the Colbert Nation. It has amongst the youngest news audience out there (80% of his viewers are in the coveted 18-49 demographic, according to a recent Pew Poll,) but the bigger…
George Bush Surrenders Heisman Trophy
Hotels of Hilton Suck Harder than Namesake Paris
I’ve been gracious about this for years, but at some point even the most jaded of satirist has to throw up his hands and say there simply has to be some grand conspiracy at work. Perhaps there isn’t. Perhaps it’s…