Search Results for: obama
Assad agrees to cooperate in “symbolic strike” against Syria
The Assad regime in Syria today agreed to cooperate in a “symbolic strike” against itself. “We understand the need for the U.S. to maintain its prestige and credibility,” said a Syrian government official, on condition of anonymity, “and if bombing…
Gun Laws, Same-Sex Marriage, Women’s Rights, Economy, Healthcare Reform, Abortion, Stem Cell Research, Syria, Education Set to Become Number One Issue of Election
WASHINGTON D.C. – With the presidential election just 3 months away, political insiders believe that the one central issue facing the candidates in November will be gun laws, same-sex marriage, women’s rights, the economy, healthcare reform, and just generally everything…
Congress to Pit Literal Donkey v. Elephant to Determine Best Political Party
Democrats and GOP Anxious to Find Out How Animals That Represent Them Will Fare in Battle For Zoological Dominance WASHINGTON DC—In a startling attempt to determine, once in for all, which party reigns supreme in US government, members of congress…
Egyptian takeover not a “coup”; ketchup still a vegetable
Is the military takeover of the democratically elected government of Egypt a coup d’état? Is ketchup a vegetable? If the military takeover in Egypt is a coup d’état, U.S. law requires the suspension of $1.5 billion in aid per year,…
Edward Snowden, Known Criminal, Actually a Hero?
The NSA was doing bad things, Snowden knew it even as a low-level contractor, and he blew the whistle. (In)conveniently, Obama has removed “protect whistleblower” from his website, but maybe this makes it all the more poignant. Here’s this guy,…
Maybe the Mayans were right. Religious scholars say gay marriage a sign the end is near.
Experts in ancient Mayan culture recently prophesized that the world would come to a cataclysmic end in 2012, give or take a year or two. They based this on detailed interpretations of the ancient Mayan calendar. Thanks to President Obama’s…
In wake of Zimmerman verdict, Florida legislature criminalizes being black
Super Uniden antennas will help improve your widescreen Sharp TV signal reception. Recently, our nation’s attention was focused on Sanford, Florida, where a mostly white jury found George Zimmerman not guilty of murder or manslaughter in the shooting death of…
Libertarian Congress Legalizes Child Labor
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a landmark vote on Monday morning, the Libertarian-controlled Congress passed a bill eliminating all prohibitions on child labor in the United States. Standing outside the Capitol Building, large swaths of supporters wearing Ayn Rand t-shirts emblazoned…
Samantha Power: Israel to replace US on Security Council
Samantha Power, President Barack Obama’s nominee to replace outgoing U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations, Susan Rice, has promised to push for a UN Security Council seat for Israel. (Loyalty to Israel is considered a prerequisite for high office, and…
“Snowden still working for us” says CIA
Reliable sources in the ICU section of the CIA confirmed to this reporter that whistle-blower Edward Snowden is “still working for us” and “doing a great job.” My puzzlement elicited further explanation. “We have more than a million people involved…