Posted in Internets Tubes Strange People

Area Grandma Thinks Googling is Sex Act

A local grandmother has become convinced that “the Google” is an amorous maneuver performed during the sexual act of “Googling.” After watching a local news segment that profiled young couples who Googled each other after the first date, 74-year-old Gail…

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Posted in Sportsfolk

Soccer Quickly Becoming America’s Like 4th or 5th Favorite Sport

A recent poll taken by randomly selected sports fans from around the nation indicated that the game of soccer, where you try and kick a ball into a goal, is drawing near to being among some of America’s most popular…

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Posted in Politics

Congress to Pit Literal Donkey v. Elephant to Determine Best Political Party

Democrats and GOP Anxious to Find Out How Animals That Represent Them Will Fare in Battle For Zoological Dominance WASHINGTON DC—In a startling attempt to determine, once in for all, which party reigns supreme in US government, members of congress…

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip

Lana Del Rey Distraught Over Backwards Spelling of First Name

LOS ANGELES — The winner of a Q Award for her song “Best New Thing” and an MTV Europe Music Award for “Best Alternative Act,” American singer-songwriter Lana Del Rey is devastated that her first name spelled backwards is A-N-A-L….

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Posted in Strange People

Kid Goes Cross-Eyed, Face Gets Stuck That Way

DERRY, NH—Despite repeated warnings from his parents, an area boy kept going cross-eyed, and now his face is stuck that way. “We warned him,” stated Sheryl Mackey, the mother of the now handicapped-looking child. “We told him if he kept…

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