Category: Health
FDA Approve Female ‘Viagra’, 4-hr Erection Notice Remains
Worry not ladies, the medical profession now unanimously accepts that it’s not your fault you no longer have the insatiable libido of a 17-year-old nympho’ and don’t ‘sexperience’ multiple juice-gushing orgasms every time you get yourself off with a rampant…
Viagra Concession Ends Transit Strike
Philadelphia, PA – Transit workers in Philadelphia, threatening to continue their strike for a raise in more than their salaries, have won a battle with the Southern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority to have most of their health care costs covered, including…
Kellogg’s New “Panacea Puffs” Claims to Cure All
Weird and bizarre nutritional claims come and go – alongside the passage of a Millennium’s ages – and too with the flight of short fickle seasons. Raw mammoth meat provided our cave-dwelling ancestors with the virility and stamina to survive…
Health Emergency Declared at Strip Clubs Citing H1N1 Fears, This Time
President Barack Obama officially declared a public health emergency due to H1N1 on Friday evening, and did so with a gusto uncustomary even for him. The Obama Administration said this proclamation will waive certain standard federal requirements as needed, on…
UN Official Calls for Promotion of Sodomy, Buggery, Family Values
At the United Nations Population Control Conference in Istanbul last week the Saudi Arabian-born executive director of the UN Population Fund, MsThoraya Obaid, called for more funding for the propagation of Third World population control and the ‘de-stigmatizing’ of sodomy….
NHS Mobile Heart Surgery Scheme Wins Kudos
Like most people with any modicum of common sense Hector McTwat has an innate fear and loathing of hospitals – especially so with the current scourge of MRSA and other flesh-eating necrotic infections patients seem to catch while in any…
Tomcat Registered as Hypnotherapist
While the age-old adage of “Even a cat can look at a King” might now be clichéd and threadbare the regulation of Nation Health Service medical staff – specifically qualified hypnotherapists – in the UK is so slipshod that even…
Europe Bans Pregnancy Cheese
A supermarket has apologised to one of its teenage female customers after she was told she could not buy mature Cheddar cheese due being pregnant. Candida Muffitch, a 15-year old schoolgirl currently studying for her A-Level exams in Benefit Fraud…
Disturbing Sexual Trend Gives Kids New Place To Stick It
Columbus, OH – A mother and daughter wait in a sterile examining room. The daughter shifts uncomfortably on the crinkly paper sheet atop the standard issue table bed. The news from the doctor is grim: the girl may never hear…
America’s Health Insurers Blow Millions on High Priced Hook
Just when you thought America’s health insurance companies couldn’t kick us any harder in the collective ass, comes the news that the insurance industry has paid coo-coo bucks for a study which says that if the present proposed health care…