Archive | The Rest

Whitney Houston Non-Story Dominates Non-News Networks

If you thought there was anything to see here folks, you were mistaken and left to image your wives just a tad darker.

Share

Posted in Making Headlines1 Comment

TV Execs “Shocked” Balloon Dad Unstable

After months, nay years of insane ramblings, lost lawsuits and 911 calls, father Richard “the dick” Heene has been deemed a toxic asset by the Hollywood Reality Productionati. A 23 year old executive from E! told Glossy News, “Dude, seriously, this guy is such a dick even we won’t give him a show, which is kind of saying a lot when you consider all the other truck-nuts we’ve given shows to.”

Share

Posted in News In Your Briefs0 Comments

Breaking Media Tradition: Balloon Boy Was a Hoax

Not ones to mince words, let Glossy News be among the first to openly declare that the balloon boy incident involving Falcon Heene, son of Richard “Big Dick” Heene, was nothing more than a costly, ill-conceived, poorly orchestrated hoax and publicity stunt. These clowns need to be taken off the airwaves, and quickly… That’s the whole story.

Share

Posted in News In Your Briefs0 Comments

NPR switches to All Pledge Drive Format

Following a highly successful, some might even say “profitable”, pledge drive week, National Public Radio has committed to an “all pledge drive” format to rival their for-profit counterparts. The amount of money the earned during the week was apparently “half our operating budget for the year,” according to greedy public media monger Marius Dejevskismidt. “We make so much money during pledge drives, and we don’t take up any more time than traditional radio does with ads, so we’re just going to stick with it.”

Share

Posted in News In Your Briefs0 Comments

In Fit of Pique, U. S. to Host Chicago Games in 2016, Boycott Rio

Share

Posted in Making Headlines0 Comments

Tele-Commuter Finds Porn Unavoidable

8-hours work devolves quickly to 6 hours of surfing the net for adult content.

Share

Posted in Making Headlines0 Comments

Dems Whip Dems to Filibuster Dem Legislation

By the time the Democratic proposal hit the floor, Harry Reid had already ensured enough Dems would vote to filibuster their own legislation.

Share

Posted in Making Headlines0 Comments

McCain Continues Lambasting Obamacare, Gravity, Having Picked Palin

Share

Posted in Making Headlines0 Comments

Panda Testes Apparently “Quite a Turn Off”, Say Crypto-Aphrodesians

In a surprising turn-around the Sino Council on Virility has rescinded their long-standing endorsement of ground n’ powdered panda junk, citing universal complaints from their users including “smells kinda funky”, “what the hell is this nasty powder,” and “Come on Zu, if you’re going to put something in my drink at least let it be a roofy.”

Share

Posted in News In Your Briefs0 Comments

Patrick Swayze Abs to be Sold in Creepy Benefit Auction

Famous dirty dancer and proxy child molester Patrick Swayze shuffled off the mortal coil last month, and the fine folks at Sotheby’s have found no better way to pay tribute than by pawning off the cryptic remainder of his abs as a token collectible. Sources close to the auction have refrained from comment, choosing instead to vomit uncontrollably in lieu. Two certain things are that it will fetch a high final bid, and that we’ll be there to cover the story.

Share

Posted in News In Your Briefs0 Comments

Strong Weather Predicted in a Place

No update as to exact locale. Details to follow.

Share

Posted in Making Headlines0 Comments

Triple-Negative Grocer Doesn’t Not Have No Bananas

It’s true, or allegedly so. We’ve had trouble verifying the story for semantic as much as practical reasons.

Share

Posted in Making Headlines0 Comments

Page 31 of 31« First...1020...2728293031
Glossy News Exclusive Exposés


-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



Glossy News Fake Commercials!





Glossy News Podcast


(Listen on iTunes or Libsyn)


More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Our Top Authors (last 30-days)



All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial