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Millionaire tricks CNN into stopping its Coverage of Missing Malaysian Plane

Millionaire tricks CNN into stopping its Coverage of Missing Malaysian Plane

Dateline: ATLANTA—Elderly oddball millionaire, Huey Longbottom, shuns the internet and receives all of his news from CNN, but taking no interest in the missing Malaysian plane, which CNN has covered exhaustively for several weeks, Longbottom orchestrated several bizarre spectacles to garner CNN’s attention and entice the news channel to exchange its lead story.
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Posted in Making Headlines, Television0 Comments

Choosing the Right Store Brand Ointment is Tough, For Life is Fleeting

Choosing the Right Store Brand Ointment is Tough, For Life is Fleeting

By Guest Writer Bill Edgecomb

What is this life but a single blink of the eye of an ever-expanding universe?

Why do we itch?

Is existence itching, the cause of which is the desire for ointment?

Are we to just wait for an itch to subside; like so many before us who have merely avoided risk to extend the length of their lives at the cost of truly living?

RIGHT: Image by Canon_Rebel_User via Flickr (CLICK TO ENLARGE)

These and many other questions come to mind when one embarks on the arduous journey of finding effective yet affordable itch relief. Continue Reading

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Posted in Opinon/Editorial, Society5 Comments

Guilt-Stricken Woman Slips Husband Antidote

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Posted in Making Headlines0 Comments

Plastic Fork Makes Valiant Effort

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Posted in Making Headlines0 Comments

5 Steps To Hosting A Million Dollar Party

5 Steps To Hosting A Million Dollar Party

So, you made your way into college…Great, good job! Now all that’s left for you to do, is to acknowledge you have no place there and all your future holds for you is a prime career in flipping burgers.

Nah, I’m joking, you’re probably the spoiled brat of a millionaire anyway and you don’t have to lift a finger for the rest of your life. The only reason you’re in college is because it’s good PR for your father’s business empire. Continue Reading

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Posted in Opinon/Editorial, Society8 Comments

Mitch McConnell Ad Begs Mockery, Gets it in Spades #mcconnelling

Mitch McConnell Ad Begs Mockery, Gets it in Spades #mcconnelling

The internet fad of the week is #mcconnelling, a little game contrived on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. McConnell released a blank stock video of himself so his SuperPAC could later pretend they didn’t ask for it, but now it’s a thing of legend.

The original ad, featured in The Daily Show clip below, gives all the background you need. Continue Reading

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Posted in Internets Tubes, Video News2 Comments

Canadians urge Ukrainians to seek Peace through Dullness

Canadians urge Ukrainians to seek Peace through Dullness

Dateline: OTTAWA—Backed by a majority of Canadians, the Canadian government has passed a resolution urging Ukrainians to stop fighting and to handle their internal conflict by being more boring, like Canadians.
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Posted in Making Headlines, Politics, World News10 Comments

Ten Ways to Know You Have Writer’s Block

1.

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Posted in News In Your Briefs0 Comments

I Guess I Have an Irrational Fear of Tubes Going in my Urethra

I Guess I Have an Irrational Fear of Tubes Going in my Urethra

Guest writer Doug Fedler

Call me crazy, but I just don’t like the idea of having tubes inserted into my urethra. I guess everyone’s got their quirks.

Maybe my thinking is a little cluttered since I’m about to have my appendix taken out.

I did a little digging on the subject and found out that sometimes they use a catheter. It’s a tube that helps you pee. Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Opinon/Editorial5 Comments

Used Car Dealer Scores 342% Below Scale [VIDEO]

Used Car Dealer Scores 342% Below Scale [VIDEO]

For the first time in history, a used car dealership has earned a score below zero on the Acham-Norbert Dealer Index, and they didn’t just make history, they set a bar too low to ever beat.

Spyder and Rocky Krakauer’s dealership is unique in that they don’t want to tell you, or better yet, don’t want you to know their physical address. Continue Reading

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Posted in Biz News, Video News6 Comments

“The Night They Raided Minskys” Reviewed by a Guy Who Even Saw the Flick

“The Night They Raided Minskys” Reviewed by a Guy Who Even Saw the Flick

Released in 1968 this flick could have been made today as a relevant retrospective to burlesque.
The naughty nature of burlesque versus the rude routines that pass as suggestive stage entertainment today are in stark contrast when you compare today’s crude crotch crunking with the clumsy bumps and grinds of yesteryear.

Produced by Norman Lear and directed by William Friedkin, it is based on a book by Rowland Barber which paints a fictional account of the invention of the striptease. Continue Reading

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Posted in Entertainment, Opinon/Editorial, Talky Pictures3 Comments

New Photo Surfaces of Early Duck Dynasty Clan Beach Party

ccShown are Willie, Jase and Jep with wives Missy, Kori and Jessica

Shown are Willie, Jase and Jep with wives Korie, Missy and Jessica.

photo credit: JeepersMedia via photopin

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Posted in News In Your Briefs0 Comments

Comfort Cooking that WON’T Give you a Heart Attack* — VIDEO

Comfort Cooking that WON’T Give you a Heart Attack* — VIDEO

Love grilled cheese but don’t care if it tastes like feet? You can have the best of neither world in this GlossyNews exclusive cooking presentation.

Really? A sandwich with healthy ingredients that tastes as good as a bacon-wrapped fried chicken cheddar pizza? Yes!

How? A little thing we call science! Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Video News6 Comments

A parent’s survival guide for when college kids come home for the holidays

A parent’s survival guide for when college kids come home for the holidays

Recently both of our daughters came home for the holiday break. Their return brought us a new set of parenting concerns. When kids go off to college, they suddenly consider themselves adults. They feel the old kids’ rules from their high school years no longer apply.

So it can be stressful to know how to parent your almost-adult child now that they’ve concluded they no longer need to listen to a word you say.

That’s why, in the most loving way possible, you should periodically remind them – roughly every two hours – about who is paying for their college and how you’d be delighted to spend that money on a Mediterranean cruise for yourself if they don’t clean up their act during their brief time home. Continue Reading

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Posted in Opinon/Editorial, Society0 Comments

Common Courtesy Rules for the 21st Century

Common Courtesy Rules for the 21st Century

Let’s face it. We’re all busy. Life now is much harder than it was back in the days before cell phones, the internet and Roomba vacuum cleaning robots.

There’s barely enough time in the day to update our Facebook status, let alone find time to see if our kids remembered to make themselves dinner before putting themselves to bed. Continue Reading

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Posted in Opinon/Editorial, Society2 Comments

Duck Dynasty Being Sold Down the River by Ming Dynasty

Duck Dynasty Being Sold Down the River by Ming Dynasty

Hey, Duck Dynasty. China called. They want you to pick up the boatload of crap souvenirs you ordered last month.

Duck Dynasty paraphernalia isn’t flying off Walmart shelves anymore, which means that the warehouse that had once housed only (made in America) commando duck calls is now filled ceiling to rafters with unsold Duck Dynasty souvenirs made in China.

Duck Dynasty may be second only to the United States government in owing more than its worth to Chinese banks.

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Posted in News In Your Briefs1 Comment

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