Homeland Security Now Monitoring RPG Freaks

Homeland Security Now Monitoring RPG Freaks

As the late, great George Formby once said:

Jihadi choppers and role playing gamers.

One is a socially useless gaggle of sexually frustrated virgins with borderline genius tech skills and a devastatingly parasitical porn addiction, the other…

Oh wait, did I get that one the right way around?

Well, anyhoo. After cruising myriad webcam sites and perusing the most cutting edge ‘amateur cinema’ the dark web has to offer, Homeland Security are now monitoring RPG fans.

The ever-swelling US intel budget has to provide value for money; so nowadays, even borderline false-positive rebels and largely specious treasonous insurrectionists have to be monitored, in order to cover all bases.

Keyboard Border Guard and Not-So-Intersectional-Radical-Meninist Jeffy H. Buckminster IV says: Continue Reading

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Posted in Entertainment0 Comments

WHY Iran? (Parody of a Mark Knopfler Classic, with Apologies to the Current President of Syria)

WHY Iran? (Parody of a Mark Knopfler Classic, with Apologies to the Current President of Syria)

CIA had no way of staying afloat
Gotta bomb them Syrian warboats
Never mind the refugees
We blitzin’ them Syrians like Germany
We created the Taliban
And we’ll drop chlorine o’er a’ the land
We got dodgy dossiers and tabloid fear
Bombing kids from Kabul to aye reet here

Why Iran, why aye, why aye man
Why aye man, why aye, why not Iran Continue Reading

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Posted in Music, War Zone0 Comments

Untalented Richard Gere Wannabe Quits Pretentious Hollywood Advocacy Movie

Untalented Richard Gere Wannabe Quits Pretentious Hollywood Advocacy Movie

Bill Maher recent welcomed the somewhat-far-from-non-unknown actor Waldo Williams to a heated debate.

Williams was to serve as a leading character in a patronizing, sub-Richard Gere, thinly-veiled political advocacy movie from Hollywood, entitled:

Spiritual Xinjiang: The Steppe Fox Howls.

But after a few day of filming this sanctimonious puff-piece about this majority-Muslim area of the People’s Republic of China, Williams said: Continue Reading

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Talky Pictures0 Comments

Madonna & Lady Gaga’s New Cult is Too Much, Even for Progressives

Madonna & Lady Gaga’s New Cult is Too Much, Even for Progressives

Madonna and Lady Gaga, frustrated at Pope Francis’ apparent failure to make headway against conservative cardinals, have decided to form their own Church, in order to restore the true authentic meaning of Catholicism.

The One True Catholic Church of the All Holy Spirit of Our Universal Cosmic Mother, or OTCCOTAHSOOUCM for short, is not a new invention, but the original version of Catholicism that the real Jesus actually taught. Continue Reading

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Music0 Comments

From Blair Effect to Cameron? How Long Before Dave Starts Making Helpful Public ‘Interventions?’

From Blair Effect to Cameron? How Long Before Dave Starts Making Helpful Public ‘Interventions?’

One of the most hilarious things on Twitter is the apparently non-satirical interventions Tony Blair makes in public life.

But it turns out brave Dave hasn’t exactly retired to have a wank in his yacht either! Continue Reading

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Posted in Internets Tubes, World News0 Comments

Tony Blair Book Dilemma

Tony Blair Book Dilemma

It’s really hard to know what section of the bookstore the Tony Blair autobiography belongs to.

Should we put it in:

The fiction section?

No, I guess that would be giving him a little too much credit!

True crime?
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Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc0 Comments

Ozzy Osborne’s Scandalous Public Toilet Incident

Ozzy Osborne’s Scandalous Public Toilet Incident

Birmingham’s most famous son, Ozzy Osbourne of Black Sabbath, has recently got caught with his pants down in a Birmingham public toilet.

Fans of George Michael will be relieved, however, to learn that all is not what it seems! Continue Reading

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Music0 Comments

Not Funny: Another Tasteless Joke About Syria (It Doesn’t Taste of Bitter Orange Though)

Not Funny: Another Tasteless Joke About Syria (It Doesn’t Taste of Bitter Orange Though)

What’s the difference between moderate Syrian choppers and an impotent autocrat? Continue Reading

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Posted in War Zone, World News0 Comments

Justin Bieber to Replace AC/DC’s Phil Rudd

Justin Bieber to Replace AC/DC’s Phil Rudd

AC/DC’s Phil Rudd is currently under house arrest for drug related criminal incidents. But it seems unlikely his fellow moshers will be keeping a seat warm for him.

Justin Bieber’s stellar solo career is about to come to an end! But don’t cry, things are going to get even better for the music scene. Justin Bieber is going to become the new chief singer of AC/DC! Not only that: lead singer Brian Johnson is about to step down.

Oh, my gosh!

Gushes Brian: Continue Reading

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Music0 Comments

(Meme): A Lesson from the Donald

(Meme): A Lesson from the Donald

THIS IS NOT AN UNPATRIOTIC MEME

THIS IS NOT AN UNPATRIOTIC MEME

THIS IS NOT AN UNPATRIOTIC MEME

THIS IS NOT AN UNPATRIOTIC MEME

THIS IS NOT AN UNPATRIOTIC MEME

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Posted in Top Stories0 Comments

“Diversity” is as “Diversity” Does

“Diversity” is as “Diversity” Does

Gotta love diversity!
You can be a hater in pretty much any way you want, and that’s OK, because ‘diversity’ is meritorious in itself.
If ‘diversity’ means cultural enrichment from Salafi Jihadists, Neo-Nazis, Alt-Right bigots, Holocaust deniers, Humanitarian Interventionists, Anti-Vaxxers, Anti-Semites, Muslimophobes, the anti-Islamophobia industry & regressive leftist community, Marxist hatemongers, Fascist fools, Kippers, Trots, Sparts, Christian Scientists, Scientologists, and God knows what else, then you might need to check your premises. Continue Reading

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Posted in Human Interest1 Comment

Bush Memes: Dead Dynasty, but their Devastation Lives On….

Bush Memes: Dead Dynasty, but their Devastation Lives On….

YOU WILL SUBMIT

YOU WILL SUBMIT

YOU WILL SUBMIT

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Posted in Politics, War Zone0 Comments

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