Author: Dexter Sinistri
Breaking News: Romney Shows Human Emotion
GlossyNews.com – In a rare break from election cycle protocol, Governor Mitt Romney was permitted to stand before a crowd of reporters, in what they all agreed was the very moment they had been waiting for in the 16-months they’ve…
Romney Camp Launches Last Minute “Why Vote?” Ad Blitz
GlossyNews.com – Television ads have been running furiously in swing states like Iowa, Ohio, Florida, New Hampshire, Old Hampshire and Colorado, but one new ad hit the airwaves last night. The GOP sponsored “Why Vote?” campaign, paid for by Romney…
Election Day 2012, Wall-to-Wall Coverage… Seriously
GlossyNews.com – Welcome to GlossyNews’ election day coverage. We’re running about three stories per hour, though more during the peak of the evening, so keep it here and we’ll feed you, baby bird. ALL ELECTION DAY 2012 HEADLINES You want…
Taylor Hicks Shocked to Hear Taylor Hicks on the Radio
Erstwhile American Idol victor Taylor Hicks was shopping Thursday in a Ralph’s, a supermarket owned by the Kroger company, when he heard something come over the PA that shocked him; a Taylor Hicks song. “I heard it and I was…
George Lucas Struggling to Spend 4 Additional Billion
George Lucas invented the Star Wars franchise, and with it, ushered in a new and previously unimagined era of movie merchandising. While he struggled to find ways to spend his first two billion dollars, he’s really at wits end now…
Holy Lord, We’re the 2nd Longest Running Satire Site
“Holy tap-dancing Christ,” said editor Brian K. White on Monday, when he realized that GlossyNews.com is in fact the second longest running satire site on the internet. “There were so many greats that came before us, and sure it was…
GlossyNews Announces 2012 Presidential Endorsement… Not Who You Think
In 2008 we endorsed then-senator Barack Obama, but apparently it is best form to consult with our staff before reaching such a weighty decision. For 2012 I requested an endorsement statement from all 127 of our writers, and the endorsements…
Stephanie from LazyTown Arrested for Prostitution?
Julianna Rose Mauriello, the actress best known for her bubbly portrayal as Stephanie on the erstwhile children’s program LazyTown was picked up at 2:36am Tuesday morning on the charge of “trespassing with criminal intent” in Virginia. READ ALSO: • Julianna…
Julianna Rose from LazyTown (Stephanie) In Adult Modeling
First of all, you’re a terrible person for clicking this link. Sure, I’m a worse person for posting it, but I’ve done nothing illegal. The youngest girl I find attractive has to be about 27… so there you go. Stephanie…
Lindsay Lohan Goes Quasi-Ballistic
“I never even stalked Samatha, who said that I did?” Denial is the biggest river in the world, and one upon which her yellow fin mammals seem all too content into which to lie. Are dolphins aiding Lindsay Lohan in…