Author: BC Bass
Snubbed the Cast of “Jersey Shore,” Kim Jong Il Attacks S. Korea
SEOUL, South Korea — Fourteen South Korean Marines and two South Korean civilians were injured after North Korea fired dozens of shells at a South Korean border island on Monday. The attack comes only days after it was discovered that…
TSA Screener Detects Testicular Cancer in Traveler, Saves Life.
SAN NARCISO, Calif. — Ceremonies will be held today in honor of William Fallopian, a local San Narciso boy turned hero. Fallopian, son of Mike Fallopian, a well known Yoyodyne executive and chairman of the Peter Pinguid Society, works for…
TSA Groping Incident Attracts New Employees to Agency
LOS ANGELES, Calif. (Glossy News) — Since the recent incident between Southern California resident John Tyner and the Transportation Security Administration (TSA), which involved the now infamous “groping” scandal, travelers are debating whether to continue moving about the Land of…
Obama Food Program Threatens Bush Weight Loss Policies
WASHINGTON, D.C (GlossyNews) — Americans are still too fat, but obesity rates in the United States appear to be slowing, according to newly released research. Government data show that 68 percent of U.S. adults are considered overweight, having a body…
The Comic Book of Anne Frank
AMSTERDAM (GlossyNews) — The Anne Frank House Museum, hoping to bring the lesson of Frank’s life and death to a new base of readers, launched the publication of the historic diary as a comic book. Spokeswoman Annemarie Bekker said the…
Hollister Co Sues Hollister, CA Again – This Time For Bedbug Infestation
HOLLISTER, Calif. (GlossyNews) — Residents of Hollister, Calif. may find themselves on the wrong side of yet another lawsuit by clothing giant Hollister Co after bedbugs were discovered in Hollister Co’s SoHo store in New York. While the source of…
Miners in Ghana Feared Dead or Taking Dives to Protest Working Conditions
ACCRA, Ghana (GlossyNews) — According to local officials in Ghana, at least 32 miners from Dunkwa Akyempim are feared dead after the gold mine they were working in collapsed from torrential rains. Although the accident occurred on Sunday, rescue efforts…
Sen. Byrd’s Death Ruled Bizarre Act of Self Mutilation
WASHINGTON, D.C. (GlossyNews) — West Virginia Sen. Robert Carlyle Byrd, the longest-serving member of Congress and the self-educated son of a coal miner, died Monday at age 92. Byrd was born Cornelius Calvin Sale Jr. on November 20, 1917, in…
BP Creates Culinary Division to Sell Turtle Meat
CHALMETTE, Louisiana (GlossyNews) — Add abysmal stock prices to the $20 billion escrow fund and BP’s existing $2.35 billion clean up tab, and you begin to realize how quickly deep pockets grow shallow. The Deep Horizon oil spill in the…
Dick Cheney to Form GOP Apology Task Force
WASHINGTON, D.C. (GlossyNews) — Texas Representative Joe Barton’s strange apology to BP CEO Tony Hayward for the government imposed $20 billion escrow account to repay damages caused by the Deep Horizon oil spill continues to spark controversy. The ill-fated gaffe…