Month: June 2011
It’s Debatable: Can the GOPTea Pull 2012 Out of Their…es (1 of 7)
DE BATE, NEW HAMPSHIRE —BobZaguy By now you know that 7 GOPTea members debated in New Hampshire. While the debate was held in that state, there was no intent by any participant to play to that state — rather the…
TV Viewer Claims His Wife Invented Commercials
A TV viewer announced that his wife was responsible for the creation of TV advertisements. When asked how he came to such a conclusion, he had this to say; “Well it was just a matter of putting two and two…
Lady Gaga Mistaken for Letterman Band Leader Paul Shaffer
It was quite an embarrassing evening for Lady Gaga Saturday when fans approached her from behind and began shouting “Paul, Paul Shaffer, can I have your autograph?” Gaga has recently gone bald and while many love her no matter what…
Muscle Confusion Applies to the Brain as Well
Rep. Anthony Weiner decided to finally show off his results using P90X, the popular workout program that uses “muscle confusion” to go from regular to ripped in just 90 days. Following in the the footsteps of fellow congressman Christopher Lee,…
Gamers Storm White House In A Risky Move
The boardgame Risk was the subject of controversy after several hardcore gamers attempted to attack the White House. A statement from the leader of the group before the incident said: “All of us have played a lot of Risk. We’re…
It’s Not Easy Robbing Banks These Days
“God I hate banks,” said the young businessman who was taking his lunch hour to deposit his pay cheque while the company he had started with worked out the details of his direct depositing. “Why the hell do we have…
Woman Injured After Practicing Faulty Feng Shui
Gladys Schumwerner of Columbus, Ohio suffered a broken finger and several lacerations after the laughing Buddha she attached to a wire hanging from her ceiling fell, hitting her squarely in the left hand. It was the third in several unfortunate…
Can Newt Gingrich Stay Out of Trouble with Bachmann and Palin in GOP Race
In order for Newt Gingrich to be able to compete in a widening field of candidates for the GOP Presidential nomination, he’s had to come clean about his past womanizing. While no one is really buying his excuse that his…
Baptist Minister Performs Exorcism on Stock Market
New York, NY – GlossyNews.com – “DEMONS OF VOLATILITY, COME OUT!” So declaimed the Rev. Buster Shillerberg yesterday afternoon on the steps of the New York Stock Exchange. The diminutive Reverend Shillerberg spoke in loud oracular tones that rolled like…
House Gym Gets Thorough Scrubbing as More Weiner Photos Surface
Washington, DC – The cleaning staff at the Rayburn House Office Building in Washington, D.C. has been asked to give a thorough scrubbing to the entire members’ gym area after more illicit photos surfaced showing half-naked NY Rep. Anthony Weiner….