Month: May 2011
Local Cat Blames Indoor Lifestyle for Catnip Addiction
BURLINGTON, VT—Yesterday, neighborhood cat, Nella Watson, revealed that she’s finally on the road to recovery after a long battle with Catnip Abuse. When asked what started her addiction to what’s colloquially referred to as “Nip” in the Feline community, Nella…
Darkness Therapy May Increase Depression in World’s Happiest Country
DENMARK (Glossynews.com International) –A new study currently underway in Denmark could prove that prolonged exposure to darkness may improve symptoms of merriment and cheer in people who are “entirely too happy.” While the evidence is inconclusive, researchers say that the…
Kate Gosselin Prefers Camping Down Under to Palin’s Alaska
It took mere seconds into the filming of a camping trip in Australia for Kate Gosselin of Kate Plus 8 to make it quite clear that the outdoors she and the kiddies experienced in Australia was far superior and way…
Early Risers Threaten World Domination
Cambridge, Mass – GlossyNews.com – As if there weren’t enough catastrophes hanging over the world already, Harverford University’s World Crisis Laboratory has identified a brand new threat to planet earth, namely, early risers. What are early risers? They’re those zombie-like…
Lose Weight Fast with Cigarettes and Cocaine
Study Shows Baby Boomers Look for Apathy, Social Inequality in Brands
This week The Gibraltar Group released the results of a study that indicates that Baby Boomers have given up on the economy ever recovering and continue to buy products that reflect their lack of hope and apathy toward the situation….
Brett Favre’s NFL Retirement Fuels Movie Rumors
When Brett Favre recently announced his retirement from football (again), speculation began almost immediately that he would finally be coaxed into making his long-anticipated return to Hollywood. For years, fans and film critics have urged the multi-talented Favre to hang…
Obama Not Reading Book Upside Down When Bin Laden Killed
It has already started, the “What were you doing when you heard the news that Osama bin Laden was killed?” Most of us were getting ready for bed or already there on a Sunday evening when the news broke. Not…