This year’s Nielsen Prayer Ratings, considered an important indicator of sociological trends, put numbers to anticipated demographic shifts, yet contained surprises too.

While “Please don’t let her be pregnant” prayers showed expected growth among males 18-25, the 2011 NPR garnered controversy and condemnation among traditional ‘big box’ religious outlets. The study shows a decided move towards secularism. Seen as even more troubling by religion providers is a market share gain for non-mainstream sects. Read the full story

THE VATICAN, ROME —BobZaguy Socio-political similarities have surfaced between the two most famous world-class conservative church leaders who publicly don’t seem to pay much mind to each other.
However, two bone-shaking statements were made a few days apart by the two men and have most of the world’s religious pundits looking for a pin to stand on. Read the full story

The mother Church of Christendom was roiled this week by excerpts from a new book by Pope Benedict LVMCIII. The book, “Because I said So” has stirred controversy due to several passages wherein the Pontiff clarifies condom use.

Somewhere in chapter XVII of the lengthy tome, Benedict writes the following: Read the full story

Astounding news continues from a Hong Kong based group of evangelical archeologists. The Xinyou Qing Project (rough English translation, ‘We go find Ark now’) first grabbed headlines this year with discovery of Noah’s Ark on Mt. Ararat. Detailed work at the site has now uncovered the most precious relics of Christendom. Read the full story

VATICAN CITY (GlossyNews) — A leading Atheist Richard Dawkins has hinted on the possibility of suing the Pope on child abuse cover ups in the Catholic church when he was Cardinal. This revelation has not led to a proper response yet. So, while the Vatican has, thus far, ignored Dawkins and says it’s a virtual impossibility, Catholics all over the world have voiced their contempt. Read the full story

VATICAN CITY (GlossyNews) — Media outlets are buzzing as sources inside the Vatican are beginning to approach the press with scandalous information about Pope Benedict XVI. Apparently several papal aides, who wish to remain anonymous, claim that the Vicar of Christ routinely uses the Lord’s name in vain. Read the full story

In a surprise move Sunday, Satan, the Prince of Darkness, announced his retirement citing that after thousands of years of initiating pestilence, wars, catastrophes and general mayhem, he was ready for a break.

“The job wears you down.” the Great Evil One said in a rare interview yesterday. “The fun goes out of it after a while. It is time to turn it over to some one new to run.” Read the full story

THE VATICAN, Rome — The Pontifical Academy sent out news this week that the Vatican was beginning to search far and wide for new communicants. This seemingly sudden rush to sign up new members follows quickly on the rather poor response to Pope B-Dict’s pass at the dissatisfied clergy of the Anglican and Episcopal churches of England and the USA respectively. Read the full story

ROME, ITALY — The Vatican Museum today announced in a press release that the latest reproduction of the Shroud of Turin is of such great artistic quality that the Museum is immediately adopting it as the “new, God’s only recognized Shroud of Turin” and that it “replaces the first original shroud which dated somewhere in the later part of the 13th century. Everyone knew that one didn’t look so good, it was faded,” according to the release. Read the full story

Pope Benny, the all-new German Mark XVI model, has left Rome for a visit to the Middle East – the first tour of the holy places of Christendom by a Pope since Christianity lost Jerusalem to the great unwashed Islamic hordes of Saladin during the Crusades of the Middle Ages. Read the full story