Tag Archive | "conservatives"

‘Is the Pope Catholic?’ No, Says Republican Congressman

Dennis Ladel, a Republican congressman from central Arkansas, says Pope Francis ‘is not Catholic enough to be Pope’.

The freshman congressman objected to a number of positions the Pope took softening the Church opposition on gay civil unions, contraception and divorce.

Mr. Ladels comments, aside from sparking a backlash from Catholics worldwide, may have greater implications by throwing into question millions of decisions that were confirmed by the phrase ‘Is the Pope Catholic?’ Read the full story


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Glossy News Soccer, um, FOOTBALL Round-up! (1/2)

The new season has already started over here, so time to take a more politically-conscious eye at the footballing world. Read the full story


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Theresa May: ‘Win the Hearts of Moderate Homosexual Community’

Apparently, because Theresa May is from the Conservative Party, she has the dispiriting responsibility of reluctantly assimilating individuals in a rather more blunt and crude way than Labour or Lib Dems.

So she has sworn to “engage with the moderate homosexual community,” in order to ensure that gay people do not cause any more “chaos, subversion and aesthetic terrorism.”

As a Conservative, I have no problem acknowledging that the gay community is a very legitimate one, which actually does have a right to exist, to pay taxes, and not have an illegitimate suspension of habeas corpus inflicted on them. Read the full story


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Prime Minister Disraeli: 7 Hilariously Cutting Putdowns

1. Civilization and Savage Witticisms

Benjamin Disraeli, the English Frankie Boyle, is quite possibly the most aristocratically flamboyant and cutting Prime Minister in UK history. With perfect comic timing, he sliced through the pompous pretensions of his opponents, like a knife through last month’s beef haslet.

He once parried the insult of the Irish Nationalist Daniel O’Connell by saying: Read the full story


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David Cameron Apologises for “Humanitarian Caliphate” Smear

David Cameron has been forced to make a humiliating climbdown, after incorrectly claiming that the Humanitarian Caliphate is an even better caliphate than the Daesh/IS/ISIS/ISIL/IKEA one.

Calm down dear; listen to what the Grand Physician says… sorry, I mean, “orders you to believe. ”

I only meant it in a flippant manner, not in a po-faced, dusty manner like the Kippers. My point was that we have a lot in common with ISIS, except we are even better. Read the full story


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Tory Candidates: As-Yet-Entirely-Unspeculated Cameron Coup (2/2)

I’m going to list for you all the Tory politicians I admire and respect and who I think fully deserve to be UK PM…

Read the full story


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Tory Candidates: As-Yet-Entirely-Unspeculated Cameron Coup (1/2)

The Objective Media (!) has been slandering Wallace Runnymede for his Miliband/Labour-Leak article “bias.”

What a dazzling array of Neo-New-Labour candidates… Read the full story


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Fact-Checking Sarah Palin’s Incomprehensible Speech

Sarah Palin was invited to spew a lahar of molten cuckoo at the Iowa Freedom Summit, proudly sponsored by Citizens United. She did not fail to fail to impress.

I took it upon myself to fact-check her statements, and there was such a steady flow of crazy magma that I had to cut it off around six minutes, saving the rest for another day.

Apparently the Wicked Witch of the Arctic’s teleprompter broke a few minutes in, so she did what she does best: wing it and hope people will take her seriously. Read the full story


Posted in Strange PeopleComments (1)

Conservatives and Liberals Still Trying to Convert Each Other

WASHINGTON – A new poll of 1,000 American adults reveals that both conservatives and liberals believe it is possible to “convert” other people to change their political orientation.

The recent Gallmausen poll found that more than 63% of Americans believe that they can convince other people to adopt their position through such rhetorical tactics as shouting at them, incessantly repeating themselves, and vicious name-calling. Read the full story


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Megyn Kelly is Still a Massive Twat, But Mitt Romney Has a Huge Wang (Censored Version)

Megyn Kelly, anchor of some white guy’s network, is still being pursued by liberals and stuff, claiming that her blatant and sour opinions that put people to shame were morally wrong and shouldn’t be on a comedy network such as FOX news. Read the full story


Posted in Politics, TelevisionComments (3)

An intellectual discussion on capital punishment, how foreign talk is turning us gay

Some people have brought up the issue of morality considering the death penalty. Some even have the audacity to say that “thou shall not kill” is an integral part of the Bible. To these heretics I respond with a decisive nay.

When God says “thou shall not kill” it is the same as your Dad saying, “Thou shall not teepee Mr. Johnson’s house or “thou shall not play Call of Duty when there is Call of Homework”.

Dad merely suggests not doing those things. He’ll still love you no matter what you do. Read the full story


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Arizona State Legisislature Votes To Change State Motto, Slogan

Giddy with the joy of Christ at successfully legalizing state sponsored endorsement of dark age phobias and insanities the Arizona State Legislature voted to to change the State slogan and motto along with other state designations and affiliations. Read the full story


Posted in Politics, ReligionismComments (20)

GOP Blames Rise in Lesbianism on Obama Administration

On Tuesday night, President Barack Obama gave his 5th State of the Union address. It was a mixed bag, if you ask anyone who was listening. As usual, Obama failed in his attempt to bring the country to a closer understanding of each other. The GOP response to the SOTU address proved that point.

Putting up a woman to do a man’s job was a ploy the GOP is good at, and they didn’t disappoint this time either. Rep. Cathy McMorris Rodgers of Washington state delivered the counter-punch to the collective Obama gut Read the full story


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Conservative Group Angered over Leftish Bias of Bible Translations

The Freedom Under a Christian Ruled Society (FUCRS) today announced their outright disgust at bible translations with a blatantly liberal agenda and plans to have the Good Book translated from the New Living Translation to one that meets their political needs, according to a press release.

Artie Ful, spokesperson for FUCRS, explained in an interview that some good Christian men and women have been feeling singled out and persecuted. Read the full story


Posted in ReligionismComments (2)

Conservative: It’s What Smart Gays, Blacks and Young Are Voting

Liberal Bastion Americans For Prosperity has a new study out, and it proves what real Americans have known for some time; smart people from all walks of life plan to vote conservative.

“[Conservative] is just where it’s at,” said gay, African-American atheist William Grean. “Their values and priorities just align better with what we believe in.” Read the full story


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CPAC 2013 Ended and So Didn’t Their Movement

Closing out of the 2013 CPAC (Conservative People Acting Crazy) conference has left many on the right feeling less than exhilarated.

Their ideals, thoughts, and policies that no longer align with changes in society have once again left them opposed to the harsh realities of modern culture. Read the full story


Posted in PoliticsComments (1)

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