Category: Science & Technologizzy
DNA Tests Reveal Hitler was a Woman
A large bone fragment of Adolf Hitler’s skull has been revealed as being that of a woman, according to the latest forensic tests carried out in the US by Princeton’s prestigious Institute of Advanced Guessology. The section of bone –…
Prince Chucklehead: Environmental Savior, Saviour and Savant
His Royal Highness Charles – the bat-eared Prince of Snails – is urging the common landless peasants of Merrie England to give up their cars in favour of walking or public transport to try to reduce carbon emissions and save…
AccuWeather Forecast for Today – Sunshine – Que?
E-mail to AccuWeather HQ: From: Rusty@noreply.com Sent: 22 September 2009 – 09:52:28 The AccuWeather site boast: “AccuWeather has developed a new algorithm that calculates what the temperature really feels like outside – named (appropriately enough) the RealFeel Temperature.
Google Dog Search Trick Pisses Off Council
A family of dodgy Balkan refugees who tried to lure back a lost dog by leaving a trail of their own urine around the streets near their home have been criticised by the town council as a bunch of irresponsible…
EPA: Free Speech Causes Global Warming
Washington, DC (BNSE): The Environmental Protection Agency released its updated quarterly findings today, which placed “Free Speech Carbon Emissions” as “one of the largest unchecked sources of Carbon Dioxide contamination in North America.”
Racist Row Revving Up, Four Sure to End Up on the Floor
A Smegmadale driver spent two nights in jail after being accused of the latest numpty-dumpty politically-incorrect crime of “revving his car in a racist manner”.
Japan Finally Makes Worse Car Than U.S.
TOKYO, JAPAN- Japanese engineers working for Toyota shocked the world today by announcing that they have at long last created a car worse than any car made in the United States. After a bold promise made by Chief Engineer Fukashi…
Genetic Engineering Goes Bananas, Boosts Chimp IQ’s
UK police and Interpol are hot on the trail of a troop of thirty-plus chimpanzees that escaped from their enclosure at Chester Zoo in Cheshire this weekend, forcing visitors to flee in terror.
Welcome to the EU’s New Dark Ages
Under the latest stupid EU ruling the manufacture and import of 100 watt incandescent light bulbs in Britain will be banned in favour of the CFL energy-saving variety – by which you can’t see to read – or write –…
Study: Cellphones Hard-Boil Brains
A 2008 joint survey undertaken by the Department of Odd Behaviour in conjunction with the Ministry for Falling Over, concluded that the use of a mobile phone definitely has an adverse effect on brain activity, although it conceded there were…