Category: World News
Greece Accidentally Receives Loan for Musical
NEW YORK, NY (GlossyNews) — On May 18, 2010, the economically embattled country of Greece received 14.5 billion euros ($17.9 billion USD) in aid from what Greek bankers presumed to be the European Union. A banking official close to orchestrating…
Stephen Hawking’s Basement Raided, Rare Historic Artifacts Found
Cambridge, England – Acting on an anonymous tip, British police raided well-known physicist, Stephen Hawking’s basement, where it is reported that they found some incredible historical artifacts from various periods in history. Included with the artifacts was an urn which…
Chavez and Castro Now Facebook Friends
Bogota North, Colombia (GlossyNews) — Posted from a secure, undisclosed location by Glossy News South American correspondent in hiding. Sources close to Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez revealed a major diplomatic coup today; Fidel Castro has accepted Chavez’ friend request on…
President Obama Detained at Phoenix Airport
Phoenix, AZ (GlossyNews) -– President Barack Obama was detained for a brief period yesterday at the Phoenix, AZ Airport by TSA officials while police determined whether or not to arrest him for not having proper identification with him at the…
NRA Rushes Arms To Help Beleaguered Mexican Drug Cartels
Boca Raton, NM (GlossyNews) — The National Rifle Association, (NRA), ever at hand to aid the munitionally deprived, is running to the aid of drug cartels in Northern Mexico. Noting that they are in need of arms and ammunition, they…
Glossy News Wins Pulitzer Prize
Tonopah, NV Reuters — Humor news media titan Glossy News has won the Pulitzer in this year’s newly added “Best exploitation of a disaster” category. The committee cited GNN’s round the clock coverage from earthquake ravaged Hawaii. Media watchers were…
Feds Arrest Christian Horse Militia for July 4th Plans
Abercrombie, MI (GlossyNews) — Breaking News: A Christian militia, made up entirely of horses, was arrested today for planning a stampede through the middle of Main Street, USA on July 4th. The leader of the herd, known only as Star,…
Census Bureau Sued for Unfair Labor Practices.
Washington, DC (GlossyNews) — Hundreds of current and former 2010 Census workers filed a class action law suit today in Federal District Court charging the United States Census Bureau with a pattern of unfair labor practices against its employees. Specific…
Hitler Found Living in Mexico with Conjoined Jewish Twins
MEXICO CITY, Mexico (GlossyNews) — Shocking reports out of Mexico City suggest that Adolf Hitler is alive and has been cohabitating with conjoined Jewish twins Golda and Miriam Slotski since 1962. “I saw him. I swear I did. I couldn’t…
Jesus Added to ‘No Fly’ list
Cairo, Illinois (GlossyNews) TSA director Laurie Partridge faced harsh questions this week in her appearance before the House sub-Committee for Members We don’t know What to do With. Ms. Partridge explained to the allegedly powerful HCMWW, the Savior of the…