Category: Top Stories
Halliburton And The Carrots, Holds the Sticks
Bogota, Columbia – In an unusual development in the strife-torn South American country of Columbia, the giant war machine known as Halliburton seems to be growing food. Over the past 6 months, on advice from a high-level undisclosed source, the…
Scholarship Program for the New York School Children
To paraphrase Aristotle, all people desire to know: who we are; how we know; how we should live. To Socrates, the health of the state depends on the knowledge and education of its individuals. To Thomas Jefferson, a democracy is…
CIA Balanced Budget thanks to Low-Cost Uzbeki Torture
According to a scathing report published today in the International Daily, the CIA relied on military intelligence extracted from Jolly Jihadi Muslim prisoners by methods of torture at extraordinary rendition centres in Uzbekistan. Uz-beki-where? someone shouts from the depths of…
Obama Mastering Asian Arm Control
SINGAPORE, ASIA — US President Barack Obama shows every intent of mastering Arm Control Photo-ops (ACP-op) over Singapore’s PM Lee Hsien Loong, as seen here in our photo at the left. Once officially documented, Obama plans to continue on with…
Army Honors Pig War Veterans
In observance of of Veteran’s Day, Army Chief of Staff General George W. Casey presided over a ceremony at Fort Benning, Georgia today, honoring “our nations greatest heroes,” by which of course he meant the veterans of the infamous 1859…
The Madman Strategy of International Relations
The lessons that can be drawn towards the current Middle-East Peace Process The nuclear alert was based on a diplomacy-supporting stratagem Nixon called the Madman Theory, or “the principle of the threat of excessive force.” Nixon was convinced that his…
Remembrance Sunday: Lest We Forget, You Know, Stuff
It is Sunday, November 8th and though Remembrance Day officially falls on the 11th of the month – to recall the end of World War One on that date in 1918 (and too the timely demise of Kaiser Bill’s Imperial…
Depressing Office Filled With Depressing Looking People
MANHATTAN, NY. – Despite talks of economic recession, the Tristis corporate headquarters on Whitehall Street is very proud to display 35 stories of boring and lackluster architectural design populated by a depressed, overworked, and underpaid staff.
The Funny Side of WW2 – Que?
According to a recent survey undertaken by the government’s Ministry for Wasting Time and Money the British youth of the 21st Century are possessed by a plethora of misconceptions concerning Germany, World War Two, the Nazi party and the Holohoax….
Clinton Tells Paki’s – “Tax ’em & Be Damned”
The US Secretary of State, Hilarious Rodent Clinton, in yet another typical menopausal outburst – yesterday rebuked Pakistani government officials for pleading they couldn’t afford to wage an all-out war against Taliban Dan and his gang of Jolly Jihadi insurgents…