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Cryptocurrencies – What are They and How can I Use Them?

Cryptocurrencies – What are They and How can I Use Them?

This guide explains what cryptocurrencies such as Bitcoin are, it sheds light on how they function and provides examples of common usage. It’s a good starter guide for those seeking to get into the field. Continue Reading

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Instagram ‘Male Feminist’ Lauds His Flat-Chested Girlfriend for Not Getting Breast Implants

Instagram ‘Male Feminist’ Lauds His Flat-Chested Girlfriend for Not Getting Breast Implants

A leading Instagram Feminist (sic) from the “Male Community” (as his college classmates call it) has recently ended up on the wrong side of the Female Community. Continue Reading

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Jeremy Corbyn Gaining Increased Support From Most Sectors Of British Society

Jeremy Corbyn Gaining Increased Support From Most Sectors Of British Society

Recent surveys of UK public opinion have consistently confirmed that Jeremy Corbyn is increasingly gaining support from most sectors of British society.

Several major political thinktanks have urgently addressed themselves to understanding the reasons behind this surprise phenomenon.

A spokesperson from the influential Centre for UK Political Research summarised the issue that has been perplexing so many: ‘There have always been a hard core of Labour supporters,’ she began. ‘They habitually vote Labour without regard to any factor other than the party’s name – often their fathers voted Labour, their grandfathers voted Labour, their great grandfathers voted Labour, and their great grandfathers’ horses wore the red flag with pride. The word “Labour” is also simpler than the longer and more complicated names of other political parties. It is therefore much easier for many of them to locate the relevant box on a ballot paper.

‘There are, in addition, other groups that base their political choices on factors other than a reasoned appraisal of current party policies,’ she continued. ‘Young people, and particularly students, are a case in point. They tend to vote against the status quo in order to demonstrate their newly acquired independence. Their opinions often align with those of their friends – most of whom wish to portray identical rebellious, individualistic and free-thinking attitudes. Jeremy Corbyn is currently their perfect anti-establishment symbol.

‘Although young people will be most affected by the future consequences of their own political choices, they lack the life experience to profoundly internalise what these choices might mean in real terms. Those who engage with politics tend to view it as a fashionable game, without consequences – like knocking on somebody’s door and running away. As a result, in common with habitual Labour supporters, they give little consideration to the future effects of the political policies for which they vote.

‘For these reasons, habitual Labour voters, students and similar groups would be expected to support Jeremy Corbyn. The very interesting factor about the current surge in personal support for the Labour leader, however, is that it comes from sectors of society who understand perfectly well that Jeremy Corbyn’s brand of simplistic, Marxist ideology cannot be applied to the complex political, social and economic circumstances of the early twenty-first century. They realise that his “back to the future socialist fantasy”, as Philip Hammond described it at the 2017 Tory conference, would lead to economic, political and social meltdown in the UK.

‘The puzzling question has emerged, therefore, about why these people are supporting Jeremy Corbyn. It’s as if the brighter and best informed passengers on the Titanic were cheering-on Captain Edward J. Smith when the iceberg was in plain sight.’

In an attempt to answer this question, the Centre for UK Political Research commissioned Ipsos Mori to interview a representative sample from the sectors of society who traditionally give the most considered and intelligent thought to the future consequences of their choices. Two of the most significant among these are the retired and the younger, professional middle class.

‘If Jeremy Corbyn becomes Prime Minister,’ conceded a typical retired respondent who was interviewed by Ipsos Mori, ‘the country will proceed, via the 1970s, back to the stone age. The point, however,’ he emphasised, ‘is that Armageddon won’t happen immediately. Corbyn will have time to hurl sacks stuffed with dosh in all directions.

‘Clearly his relationship with the unions will mean that he won’t be able to object to huge pay rises for all workers – increases that have no connection with productivity. If he tries to stop that, there are loads of wannabe Arthur Scargills in the union movement who’ll relish their opportunities to hold the country to ransom again – we’re starting to see that now with the railways. From what Corbyn says, however, it looks like everyone else will get handouts too – from student loan write-offs to free care for the elderly.

‘I’m not totally clear about the fine details of Corbyn’s policies,’ this respondent continued, ‘but I get the impression that a Labour Party activist will be stationed on every street corner with a wheelbarrow full of fivers, handing them out to anyone who comes past. I’m bound to get some benefit from all that, and it’ll also cheer people up. I’m so fed up with everyone around me being really miserable and depressed due to austerity.

‘Obviously Corbyn’s policies will eventually lead to the country going bankrupt,’ this respondent concluded. ‘I’m seventy-two years old, however. The latest date for the next election will be in 2022. By that time I’ll be seventy-seven. If Corbyn gets in, I can reckon on four great years – and I’ll probably be dead before the shit hits the fan big time.’

Slightly different, though similar, reasoning was expressed by a respondent from the professional middle class – a forty-five year old accountant who is married with two children. She also referred to the “Corbyn Window,” as it has been called – the predicted period of joyous fun and prosperity between the Labour leader’s general election victory and the total economic collapse of the UK.

I know this is irrational,’ this respondent explained to Ipsos Mori, ‘but I just want to feel good for a while. A friend of mine has an alcohol problem,’ she continued by way of analogy. ‘He was dry for months, but then he had a personal crisis and went back on the booze. He told me that he knew it was a stupid thing to do, but he just felt so down that he wanted to do anything to feel better in the here and now, regardless of its future consequences. For me, deciding to support Jeremy Corbyn was like my friend opening that first bottle of scotch. I hate myself for it, and I know I’ll regret it, but it feels so good that I don’t care.

‘Austerity is a very sensible plan,’ she continued, ‘but I’m sick of it. There’s a food bank in my village – the need for food banks is a total bloody disgrace in Britain in the twenty-first century. I saw the film, I Daniel Blake, earlier in the year. That’s not fiction; that’s what the state is really doing to those unlucky people who’ve fallen on hard times – and it could be any of us at any time. Theresa May says she’s listening, although she doesn’t say what she’s listening to. I’m guessing it’s loud rock music through headphones as she, sure as hell, isn’t hearing ordinary people.

‘The other thing about austerity,’ this respondent added, ‘is that it often fails for reasons outside your control. I’ve scrimped and saved at various times in my life, but then, when I’d saved enough money to look forward to buying what I’d planned, the car needed expensive repairs or I got some other unexpected bill that blew the lot. I might as well not have bothered to make the effort in the first place.

‘I bet it’ll be like that with national austerity,’ she concluded. ‘We’ll balance the books and then, the next day, we’ll go to war with North Korea or an asteroid will hit the Earth or something – all that hardship would’ve been for nothing. When I look at it that way, it doesn’t seem so crazy to let Corbyn go bananas and hope against hope that it’ll, somehow, turn out alright in the end.’

Of the social groups sampled by Ipsos Mori, the only one that was predominantly not planning to vote Labour at the next opportunity was the mega-rich. ‘I think the government’s doing a great job,’ said one such respondent from the bridge of his luxury yacht. ‘I’m certainly getting wealthier. Although I do think they’re too soft on the whingeing poor. You never got this level of unrest in my great great grandfather’s day when we used to hang the blighters for stealing a loaf of bread.’

‘Due to the Ipsos Mori survey, we now have a much clearer picture,’ concluded the spokesperson from the Centre for UK Political Research. ‘Most people, whether they understand government policy or not, and whether they agree with government policy or not, don’t like it.

‘This negativity has currently reached such an extent that anything else seems preferable. As an alternative, most of the UK public would willingly vote for Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, any of the Telletubbies … or even Jeremy Corbyn.’

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Random Thoughts: Catalonia (Sadly Non-Satire) News Commentary Roundup

Random Thoughts: Catalonia (Sadly Non-Satire) News Commentary Roundup

I was initially pretty neutral on Catalonia, as I am very skeptical about all the dogmatism, emotivism and virtue-signalling around complex geopolitical disputes.

But I think the grey area is being swallowed up by the brutality of Madrid and the police.

Anyone else feeling the same? Continue Reading

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Crazy Cannibal Hannibal Lecter Disgusted He Can’t ‘Take a Knee’ at NFL Matches

Crazy Cannibal Hannibal Lecter Disgusted He Can’t ‘Take a Knee’ at NFL Matches

Notorious violent extremist and culinary-diverse social mayhem warrior Hannibal Lecter is “disgusted” and “repulsed” at being forbidden to take a knee from NFL players.

I’ve lived in this country so long, I’ve contributed all I have.

I’ve never just decided to take, take, take…

Well, apart from the odd spare rib.

Or ankle, or toe, or something.

But who cares?

This is the USA, and if I’m not allowed to take a knee, then I don’t recognise this country any more.

Surely it’s all about individual liberty?

What kind of ‘freedom’ is this, when I’m not even allowed to have a cheeky Nando’s, er, cheeky chomp on the ankle of my BNFLF?

It starts off with the cannibals, but it never ends with the cannibals.

Those who burn cannibals will soon burn terrorists and Nazis.

Culinary diversity truly is our greatest strength!

Justin Trudeau loving quacks:

It is a source of great grief and disappointment that Mr Lecter’s contributions to the rich culinary diversity of America have not met with full approval or even indiscriminate, hysterically flamboyant celebration from his peers.

Mr Lecter, you are always welcome in Canada.

Kraft Durch Diversität!

Some, however, argue that while pluralism is a good thing, you still have to draw the line somewhere.

Some might say that eating other human beings is as good a line as any!

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Leonard Cohen and the Risk of Love

Leonard Cohen and the Risk of Love

One of the most beautiful things a singer or a creator can do for you is to de-de-humanize you. Continue Reading

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Kim Jong Un Blames “Dishonest Fake News Media” for Smearing “Tremendous” Missile Launch

Kim Jong Un Blames “Dishonest Fake News Media” for Smearing “Tremendous” Missile Launch

Charismatic populist President Kim Jong Un recently delivered an inflammatory tirade about the bought-and-paid global MSM hacks who are deliberately lying about his recent “tremendous” and “unbelievable” missile launch successes. Continue Reading

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(GN Video) Chair B ‘n’ B: Why Waste Your Money When  You Can… Just Waste Your Money?

(GN Video) Chair B ‘n’ B: Why Waste Your Money When You Can… Just Waste Your Money?

Note from Wallace:

Glossy News troublemakers Brian White and Dan Geddes have recently got together with their latest scam:

Chair B ‘n’ B! Continue Reading

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Rest in Peace, Tom Petty

Rest in Peace, Tom Petty

I’m really tearful about the death of Tom Petty.

Not because I knew Tom or ever spoke with him, but because his music gave me so much comfort and consolation at a very difficult time.

Even if it seemed like I was just wallowing around in the Mire of Contrition, or even of something much more self-serving and ignoble…

Unadulterated guilt.

Thanks for everything.

Put in a good answer for me when that day finally comes.

I shall be sure to do the same for you.

https://www.facebook.com/OneTongueJohnny/?hc_ref=ARSUh8lIcg-s6QxeSFyUjTJxQABwjtqBzvpPYYz5D4Q4hjwpky9oo34TRr3p0ezJTzo&fref=nf

Image attribution:

http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=11966&picture=tulip-field

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Damage Limitation – The Essential Checklist For Senior Managers

Damage Limitation – The Essential Checklist For Senior Managers

There comes a day in the life of many top executives, both in the public and private sectors, when aspects of professional conduct within their organisations are exposed and interpreted by the media and public in an irrationally negative light.

Entirely normal, routine and reasonable organisational behaviour seems to periodically attract accusations such as: fraud, greed, contempt for financial regulations, a cavalier disregard for the interests of one or other sector of society – or even a total avoidance of laws in general.

Most irritating and perplexing for the poor managers subjected to such scurrilous and unjust allegations is that claims are not simply made by the ill-informed, little people. Ordinary losers cannot, after all, be expected to understand normal organisational affairs at a senior level. In addition to these plebs, simplistic, misinformed and unreasonable criticisms are frequently levelled by regulatory bodies, public enquiries, the courts, and governments.

It is of absolutely no use to respond to such institutions by pointing out that they are being stupid and pedantic and do not understand your organisation or the real world – true though this may be, it would simply provoke further antagonism.

The following checklist has therefore been devised by those with prior experience to assist senior executives when they find themselves in such an unfortunate and unenviable position.

The notes below recommended key actions and public statements for each stage of the witch hunt that an unfortunate, misunderstood top manager might have to endure.

1 – Alleged issue first exposed in a manner that cannot be ignored:

*Say that you are taking the allegations very seriously indeed.
*Immediately and strenuously deny any personal wrongdoing.
*Promise a full internal enquiry.
*If anyone has been obviously physically harmed or killed, say that safety is your number one priority.
*Stress that the customer (or service user or whoever) always comes first.
*Argue that an independent enquiry is totally unnecessary and that you are in the best position to identify the factors that may have led to misunderstandings about the matters alleged.
*Make plans to transfer as much money as possible to your untraceable, offshore accounts.
*Check expiry date of passport.

2 – Sufficient evidence of the alleged issue has emerged to make a blanket denial no longer credible:

*Say that you are appalled by what has happened and that you are determined that there should be a full and transparent process to uncover where mistakes have been made.
*Welcome any police investigation, and say that you will cooperate fully with it.
*Welcome any independent enquiry, and express certainty that your honesty and integrity will be vindicated.
*Practise looking sincere in a mirror before attending any parliamentary committee.
*Behave in relation to all questioning as if your organisation is a car that has mysteriously developed a fault. You just happened to have been driving it at the time, but you are as amazed and bewildered as any layperson about what caused the problem.
*Never try to blame anyone else, however junior, or they will point the finger back at you. Remember that a lot of your staff knew exactly what was going on. Continue to adopt, therefore, the attitude that any alleged irregularity simply arose in a mysterious, unexpected way and, as such, blame could never be attributed.
*Transfer as much money as possible to your untraceable, offshore accounts.
*Check extradition arrangements with the countries to which you might leave in a hurry.

3 – Alleged issue proven:

*Say that the final official judgement on your organisation’s behaviour was a deeply humbling experience (the Murdoch gambit – as it has come to be known).
*Admit that mistakes had been made.
*State that lessons will be learned.
*Double check that your personal assets are quite separate from any corporate funds that may be required to pay fines or compensation.
*Keep your head down for a few months until everyone has forgotten about the matter – or until another innocent colleague in a different organisation has become the victim of a similar hysterical feeding frenzy by the media, the public and official bodies.

4 – After the dust has settled:

*Simply carry on exactly as before until faced with any new set of scurrilous and unjust accusations – after all, why should you change your behaviour? You did nothing at all wrong.

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Blair Demands Humanitarian Intervention in Catalonia

Blair Demands Humanitarian Intervention in Catalonia

Former UK Prime Minister and beloved public figure Anthony Charles Lynton Blair (known affectionately to most Britons as ‘Tony Blair,’) has responded with an astonishingly inspirational display of righteous indignation… Continue Reading

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The Month’s Most Controversial Religion & Atheism Headlines (V)

The Month’s Most Controversial Religion & Atheism Headlines (V)

Jehovah’s Witnesses Condemn ‘Backward, Superstitious, Abusive Cult’ of Scientology

Corrupt & Godless Conservative Cardinals Conceal the True Pro-Darwin Bible Manuscripts Continue Reading

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The Month’s Most Controversial Religion & Atheism Headlines (IV)

The Month’s Most Controversial Religion & Atheism Headlines (IV)

Most BRUTAL DNC Wikileaks Revelation Yet! Hillary & Podesta Have been Funding Scientology!

ISIS Vow Revenge, Appalled to be Associated with the Same People Alleged to be Propping Up L Ron Hubbard’s Batshit Sci-fi Cult Continue Reading

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Players Permitted to Skip National Anthem Without Fear of Discipline

Players Permitted to Skip National Anthem Without Fear of Discipline

Here it is again. The anthem protest issue refuses to die. And if you are wondering why no one will let you simply immerse yourself in the updated odds for NFL games or whatever it is that consumes football enthusiasts, you can blame the anthem protests. Continue Reading

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UK Public Increasingly Reluctant To Express Ill-informed Opinions

UK Public Increasingly Reluctant To Express Ill-informed Opinions

An increasing number of people in the UK are declining to express definite opinions when asked about complex issues of which they know little.

TV journalists first began to detect this phenomenon in early 2017 when undertaking random street interviews. Continue Reading

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Brexit Exposes Large Scale Corruption By EU Farmers

Brexit Exposes Large Scale Corruption By EU Farmers

The UK Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (DEFRA) has revealed that it is investigating nearly five hundred UK farms. All the investigations relate to the illegal claiming of EU farm subsidies. Continue Reading

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