Author: Rusty
Weapons Inspector: Suicide Profession or Good Fun?
Police are investigating a possible crime scene after a British atomic energy and weapons specialist involved in negotiations with Iran over its nuclear programme fell 40 metres to his death inside the UN’s headquarters building in Vienna. Officials announced this…
Idiotic India Goes on Wicked Witch Hunt
A small coven of women were paraded naked, beaten with sticks of rhubarb and forced to eat human excrement by superstitious villagers after being branded as witches in India’s remote northern Moronland province. Police chief Ramjam Jaffacake told a reporter…
Diocese Brings Prettier Face to Kiddie Fiddling: Bankruptcy
The US Roman Catholic diocese of Wilmington is attempting to delay the start of a paedophile sex abuse trial yet again with a last ditch bankruptcy move to file for Chapter 11 protection since a celebrated deviant clergy / kiddie…
Church Choirs Get ‘Shut the Hell Up’ Notices, Finally
Two churches in London have been ordered to keep the noise down after neighbours complained about the deafening hymn renditions from their choir’s singing voices at Sunday services. Noise abatement notices were issued to the Church of Latter Day Rastafarians…
BNP Boss Falls Victim to Lynch Mob
It was a moment 5,000 mixed race and ethnic Brit’ protesters – stark-bollock naked, daubed in traditional blue woad and massed outside the London BBC TV Centre – had spent much of the day trying to stop until they got…
Balkanized Iraq Needs Strong Leadership
At least 132 people have been killed and 520 injured in two massive car bomb attacks in Baghdad, according to the FUBAR News Agency and reports coming in on the Abattoir Channel. The blasts hit the Department of Injustice building…
Buck-Ass Nekkid Germans Hit the Hiking Trail
Germany has a history of being traditionally tolerant of nudity – especially so having been caught with their collective pants down in two World Wars across the past century – but a plan to give naked ramblers their own wilderness…
Israel’s Mushroom Cloud Emanates from Ehud Barak
Israeli Defence Minister Barak (Hey – coincidence or what – he and the all-new American President share a common name) has voiced Tel Aviv’s concern about the positive progress in talks between Iran, the IAEA and major world powers on…
Global Warming Scam B’Gores Millions to Death
The UK faces a “catastrophe” of floods, droughts and killer heatwaves if world leaders fail to agree a deal on climate change, the prime minister will warn. Prime Munster Gordon ‘Cry Wolf’ Broon is set to address the Major Economies…
UN Goldstone Report Hints Israeli War Crimes “Uncool”
The UN Human Rights and Wrongs Council has backed a report into the festive season-of-goodwill Israeli offensive in Gaza that accuses the IDF and the Knesset government of dastardly Nazi-style war crimes bordering on a genocidal mini-Holohoax. The report, authored…