Author: Juvenal Delinquent
Casey Anthony Jurors Ask Judge if They Can ‘Take it Back’
ORLANDO, FL – In yet another shocking twist for a case that has gripped the nation, the 12 jurors who voted to acquit Casey Anthony of all murder charges in the death of her daughter Caylee, appear to be more…
Conspiracy Theorists Sue Esquire For Implying Faked Moon Landing Book a Hoax
OUTER SPACE – Conspiracy theorists Joseph Farah, publisher of World Nut Daily, and Jerome Corsi, author of the best selling book Capricorn One: NASA, JFK, and the Great ‘Moon Landing’ Cover-Up, are suing the magazine Esquire, its parent company Hearst…
Muscle Confusion Applies to the Brain as Well
Rep. Anthony Weiner decided to finally show off his results using P90X, the popular workout program that uses “muscle confusion” to go from regular to ripped in just 90 days. Following in the the footsteps of fellow congressman Christopher Lee,…
Weiner Says It’s Not His ‘Weener’
NEW YORK, NY. GlossyNews.com – Rep. Anthony Weiner has aroused more suspicion today by neither confirming nor denying that the crotch in question is his, and reiterated his opinion that the incident is, “a distraction, and nothing more than a…
Birthers Regroup After Minor Setback, Demand REAL Documents
Chastened by Obama’s release of the long form of his official birth certificate, leading proponents of the ‘birther’ movement (now officially dubbed ‘afterbirthers’) met today to rethink their strategy of trying to prove President Barack Obama is not a “natural-born…
Hooray For Me, F**k You: Filthy Rich Protest for More Wealth
NEW YORK – Jumping on the protest bandwagon, which began with a carefully orchestrated campaign of coddled working and middle class protesters in Wisconsin and elsewhere fighting to retain their grossly overpaid wages and awesome HMO benefits, the wealthy minority…
Nuke Energy Leaders Bravely Sacrifice Everything to Save Radioactive Fuel Rods
WASHINGTON DC – An emergency meeting was convened today between President Obama, top Japanese officials, members of the IAEA, General Electric CEO Jeffrey Immelt, and several nuclear industry leaders, to discuss ways to save the precious fuel rods from the…
The Role of Facebook and Twitter in History’s Revolutions
There’s been a lot of debate recently over the role social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter played in the recent Egyptian uprising, however very little has been mentioned of their importance in history’s other great revolutions. This report chronicles…
Craigslist Congressman says photo was actually for new P90X ad
Backpeddling from his resignation over the recent photo scandal, former Rep. Christopher Lee now says the picture was meant to show off his results from using P90X, but accidentally got e-mailed to the “Women Seeking Men” forum on Craigslist. “What…
Computer Beats Kids at Candy Land… Holy Terrorbytes, Batman
IBM is at it again, but this time their target for domination isn’t aimed at nerdy trivia buffs or intimidating chess masters. No, its electronic jaws are now chomping at the bit to take a megabyte out of sweet innocent…